Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu‎

Volume 6.5, Me and the Seaside and the Festival Uproar (First Half)

“By the way, Aki-kun. You said that you were going to invite a few friends, so how many did you manage to get?”

“There are 9 people including nee-san.”

“Nine people? That’s a lot.”

“Yes. Everyone wanted to join in so there are a lot of people. Is it not OK?”

“No. It won’t be a problem if we rent a van……But who did you invite?”

“En—……, well, they’re schoolmates.”

“School mates. Like who for example?”

“Like Yuuji, Hideyoshi, Muttsurini……”

“Sakamoto-kun and the other guys eh. What about the others?”

“…………………Hi”

“’Hide’? I thought I’ve already heard you mention Hideyoshi-kun?”

“Hi……Hi ? Mit ? Su ?”

“Aki-kun. Please clench your teeth and endure for just a short while.”

“So, sorry! I was playing a small joke! It’s just a small joke so please don’t hit me!”

“I know. If you speak honestly, nee-san will give you a kiss as a reward.”

“The other four are people from this universe that you’ve met yesterday.”

“You’ve answered me nicely. Then~ Raise your chin and close your eyes”

“Wait! I was obviously lying just now!?”

“Humans can be explained as people from this universe generally.”

“What’s with this ridiculous reasoning!? Wait wait wait wait! I apologize so please STOP, STOP!”

“……To be this hated, it’s really—“

“Ah……So, sorry. You’re hurt? But, you can’t do those things, nee-san.”

“—I can’t help it.”

“Pervert! There’s a pervert here! A hopeless pervert is actually living so close beside me!”

“Don’t take it seriously. Thirty percent of it is just a joke.”

“Not good……This person, is more than fifty percent serious……”

“Moreover, Aki-kun should be blamed for lying to me in the first place.”

“Oo…… That……”

“Why are you trying to hoodwink me?”

“That……”

“Yes.”

“If I say it……Will you keep your cool?”

“If it isn’t something like the girls are coming, I won’t be angry nor will I beat you up, and I won’t push you or force you to cross dress—Where are you going Aki-kun?”

“No! I don’t want to make you angry, to be beaten up, pushed down, or forced to cross dress!”

“I see. So there are girls coming with us.”

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.”

“……Well, it’s fine. They’ve also taken good care of you, compared to letting you guys do something at somewhere I can’t see, it’s better this way.”

“Eh? Then, nee-san agrees to this?”

“It won’t happen again.”

“Thank you, nee-san.”

“But.”

“En? What?”

“If something happens during the journey that is deemed by me as impure relationship with the opposite sex……That time, you understand what’ll happen right Aki-kun?”

“Ah, ahaha……What, what will happen then?”

“I’ll murder your whole family.”

“No, if that’s the case, you’ll be included too.”

☆

Large clouds are floating in the clear sky. That light breeze that can be felt is changing the shape of this cloud. Seeing this scenery before my eyes, only then could the real summer atmosphere be felt. There’s no better weather to bask in the sea.

“Today’s weather sure is suitable for a beach trip.”

Rays of sunlight is unable to make his expression look serious, he who is wearing T-shirt and a pair of shorts, that line is muttered by Yuuji who seems full of summer mood no matter how you look at him. This guy has a good physique so wearing crudely really suits him.

“Really. My ch—No, my heart’s really excited.”

The one talking is Hideyoshi wearing a combination of thin hoodie and shorts. That friend of mine who is still confusing others about his sexuality with his cute appearance even today, is carrying a sports bag with his eyes full of eagerness waiting for the arrival of the car.

“……I’m worried that the blood packs will spoil.”

Muttsurini, who’s wearing crumpled denims is looking around with an anxious look while carrying an ice box. I guess that lots of blood packs that provides life-support for that guy is inside. When the sea is mentioned, one will think of swimsuits. I’d say that if we’re not careful, we may risk crossing the Styx River in a short while—This fact can’t be denied.

“Right, Akihisa-kun. It’s a little too late to ask this, but can so many people fit into the car?”

Himeji-san who was wearing a tight rough cotton pareo and T-shirt with a tight sleeveless top on it was looking at me while hugging her travel bag with both of her hands. Her different style is really refreshing.

“I guess so. There’s nine people including your sister, can we still use a normal driving license?”

“En—, nee-san said that there’s no problem……”

Minami’s standing beside me with a long wrap dress and T-shirt. Although this is the first time I’ve seen Minami wearing a casual skirt, I find that any clothes suit her due to her slender build.

“……The driving license for medium cars allows more than eleven passengers……”

“I’ve checked it online yesterday night, the driving license may be normal, but since the car is different, it’s fine even if there are more than ten passengers.”

The A Class pair of Kirishima-san and Kudou-san explained to us. Kirishima-san matched a mini-skirt with a light-coloured summer sweater. As if it actually makes people forget the attractiveness of white and pink of the usual summer heat.

On the other side, Kudou-san,

“En? Yoshii-kun. You seem to really like my dress-up.”

“No, no. I don’t.”

“……Oh, I see……”

“Wh, what?”

“You want to know what’s under my tights, right~?”

“I, I didn’t think of that……!”

Kudou-san is wearing a pair of shorts, her top is tight and short-sleeved and somehow a little revealing. I can’t help but keep noticing her sunburn marks from the time when she changed into her swimsuit, this is bad news for several reasons……

I looked away, and saw Yuuji squint his eyes when he saw Kudou-san’s dress-up.

“Oh really. Kudou joined the swimming club. That’s why she has those healthy sunburn marks.(Puchi—Pugupugu)”

“……Unfaithfulness is forbidden.”

The figure of Kirishima-san poking Yuuji’s eyes calmly and him crumpling onto the floor. That idiot will never learn.

“Oh, it’s still the same, both of them—“

“(Sha-)Ye, yes”

“(Sha-)Re, really, their relationship is really good”

“Both of you please wait. I really wish I was hallucinating, but did you guys just take an offensive stance with both of your fingers pointing at my eyes?”

Both of them would attack me once in a while, silently, recently. Let’s not talk about Minami, even Himeji-san has become this experienced, I really do feel that Himeji-san is being influenced negatively by Class F.

We chatted for a while, Muttsurini who has the sharpest eyes is the first to notice that atmosphere.

“……The car’s here.”

“En? Ohoh. It seems to be so”

A big car that can be considered a mini-bus is driving towards us, stopping in front of us slowly.

The driver’s door opened, the figure that exited is,

“Ah eh……? I’m sorry for letting you guys wait”

My biological sister who shares the same blood with me, Yoshii Akira. By the way, I think this is the first time seeing nee-san drive. I don’t feel safe with nee-san who, is prone to acting outrageously, driving……But it looks like there won’t be any problems.

“Nope, we just arrived early”

“En. We get too excited if we don’t watch out”

“……Looking forward to it”

“Akira-san. Thank you for inviting all of us.”

“I’m really looking forward to this trip too”

First, Yuuji and the other five who are already acquainted with her greeted her. Nee-san smiled when she heard it and replied “The way you guys put it makes me happy”.

Next, Kirishima-san and Kudou-san who are meeting nee-san for the first time went and introduced themselves.

“……Nice to meet you for the first time. I’m Sakamoto Yuuji’s wife Sho “Just wait for a minute! You’re just speaking as you please (Puchi—Pugupugu)”……Shouko”

“Hello, Yoshii-kun’s sister. I’m Kudou Aiko”

“Hello, Shouko-san, Aiko-san. I’m Aki-kun’s sister Akira”

The peaceful greetings went on. From the looks of it, there are so many girls who are really lively. I’m usually at a place like Class F which is dirty and chaotic, now I have an indescribable and fresh sensation.

“Then. Staying like this isn’t going to do anything, let’s get going”

Nee-san pointed at the car.

“Right. We can still talk in the car, time is precious so let’s set out. Everyone please sit wherever you like.”

“““Yes—”””

I tossed the baggage and Yuuji, who was rolling on the floor, into the car.

The exciting trip has finally begun.

☆

"By the way, Akihisa."

"Hm? What is it, Yuuji?"

In the car, Yuuji, who was sitting beside me, broke the ice.

Regarding the seats, boys and girls were separated from each other because nee-san was close by. Kirishima's sad face and Yuuji's jolly face were in contrast to each other.

"Have you ever gone before to the place we are heading right now? What kind of place is it?"

"Eh? Ahah, hmm. About that……"

I stopped talking for a moment in order to recollect my memories.

If I have to describe that place to him……

"Hmm? What is it? Have you completely forgotten about it?"

"Impossible. How can something like that happen?"

That guy's so rude. There should be a limit to when you look down on others' memory.

Right. That was actually—

"I remember correctly, it happened during spring, summer or autumn, about five to eight years ago."

"The time range is really huge."

"Methinks that you've completely forgotten about it."

"……*nods*"

I'm sorry. My action was vain.

"In other words, it'll be a surprise for everyone when we get there."

By the way, Hideyoshi, who was sitting in front of us, turned his head towards us.

"Right. We should take this rare chance and hope for the best."

"If we're going to a nearby beach, then there's only a few, but if we're going somewhere far and are going to stay overnight, part of the excitement comes from not knowing where we're going to."

Himeji-san and Minami, who were sitting in the same row with Hideyoshi, turned around and revealed their excited smiles.

Since there were nine passengers in this car, the seats arrangement starting from the front was like this: two persons - two persons - three persons - two persons. The first row included nee-san, who was driving, and Muttsurini, who sat in front because he claimed to be carsick. Behind them were Kirishima-san and Kudou-san. Next was Himeji-san and co. Yuuji and I were sitting in the last row. Everyone put their baggage on their own seat……But it seems that the seats are a bit too narrow in the three-persons row.

"Himeji-san. The things on that seat, would you like to hand them over to me here?"

"Eh? Ah, sure. You mean these?"

"Yup. Our seats are more spacious. Just put them here."

"No, you don't have to mind about us since we're fine with it. Minami and Kinosheeta-kun are very slim……but I'm not……"

Himeji-san's tone suddenly lowered. Eh? Did I step on a landmine?

"Mizuki. Could it be that you've……grown fatter?"

"Wawu!"

The moment Minami spoke, Himeji-san leant backwards while hugging herself.

"Just, just a little! It's really just a tiny bit, I mean……Just a little, a lot……"

"Where?"

"No, that's not it! It must be… that my long hair is heavy! That's right! It's because of that! It has nothing to do with ice cream and beverages!"

Speaking of that, the weather had turned hotter lately, and the season when our appetite for ice-cream and beverages was stronger had arrived.

"Humph. How silly of you. You got carried away when you lost just a little amount of weight not so long ago. That's why now you have to face such a consequence."

"Ugh……I was too careless……"

"I got slimmer by a little due to the summer burnout."

"Ehhhh! That, that's too sly! I feel seriously betrayed!"

"Right. I got slimmer……in the chest part……"

"…………"

It's as if the atmosphere of an eerie night drifted around the front row. Why are girls this concerned about their bodies? Both of them already have bodies that are considered outstanding compared to others……Well, although Minami's chest looks rather disappointing……

"Himeji and Shimada are both overly concerned about things like these."

Hideyoshi suddenly spoke as if to cheer those two up; I guessed he's thinking what I was thinking. However, Minami covered her face instead when she heard him.

"Don't mind me! After all, my breasts grows slower than Kinosheeta's!"

This is bad. That rumor that I carelessly said seems to be known by Minami.

"That's enough, Kinosheeta! Don't lie just to cheer me up! I understand! After all Kinosheeta is just going to leave me alone and have huge boobs."

"Couldn't something like that be more tragic for me!?"

Ugh……Words like these, I'd be glad if they restrain themselves from saying them in front of us boys……it's hard to decide how to react……

"But Kinosheeta-kun, you actually don't have to worry about your body……your waist is so slender……"

"Calm down, Himeji. How is it possible for me, who is a boy from birth, to have a slender waist?"

"Really……saying that it's tragic to grow breasts, there's a limit to the luxuries you enjoy……"

"They're hopeless……the two of them can't understand what I said……"

Hideyoshi muttered softly as if he did best. It seems that everyone has their own things to worry about.

Hideyoshi cleared his throat as if to settle down the gloomy atmosphere, and spoke crisply to two of them.

"But, just like I said, aren't the two of you simply over-concerned? Himeji, Shimada, you don't seem to have changed at all!"

"That, that's not true! I've gotten fatter by 328 grams!"

"Yeah! I've lost 0.4 centimeters!"

"You two sure use weird units of the measurements……"

There's clearly a difference between the two.

"No, although I'm usually not this concerned, this time……"

"Swimsuits are involved, and……"

"Yeah. I guess so."

Himeji-san and Minami suddenly turned to look at nee-san driving, without a reason. I wonder what they are so concerned of.

"……Indeed, Akira-san is very dangerous."

"Right~*boing**twist**boing*! I do feel this way too. I, who’s usually unconcerned about such issues, feel a little bit envious."

Even Kirishima-san and Kudou-san in the second row join in the conversation. It seems like girls have an interest in this sort of thing.

"Yup. Those breasts, I just can't stop envying them…"

"I'm also jealous of how slenderness her waist is……"

"……Akira-san. That's really sly."

"She's like a model~ This pair of breasts are at a despicable degree just like Mizuki's. They look really bouncy."

"What kind of swimsuit do you intend to wear? With a body like this, anything that you wear is bound to look good……"

"Is it a rather a sexy bikini? How awesome……"

"……I'm envious."

"The swimsuits from those erobooks that look like ropes would fit you too."

"Eh? Kouta-kun, what happened to you? There's a red liquid coming out of your nose."

"……I'm carsick."

It's the first time I'd heard of someone having a nosebleed when he's carsick.

Never mind. It'll be troublesome if we simply interrupt them when they are talking about their bodies, so we'll just go with the flow.

"By the way, Hideyoshi, just put these things here. Mind passing them to me?"

Let's place those baggage properly first.

"Hmm? OK then, please take care of them."

While speaking, Hideyoshi passed me the baggage on his legs and the one beside him, both seemed to be stuffed to the brim. This overly heavy thing……I guess it must belong to Muttsurini. Could it be that he brought a lot of those equipment for his camera and stuff?

I placed the baggages that were passed to me here. There was still some space left.

"It seems there's enough space here for one more?"

"Oh. Then, I'll also pass this to you."

While speaking, Hideyoshi passed to me a familiar baggage. These are nee-san's things. It seems that there's nothing fragile inside, so I'll just put it here to cushion Muttsurini's stuff.

"*zip*--Hmm?"

As I moved slightly, the opening of the baggage widened a bit. Stuff might come out if I leave it that way. I guess I'll have to zip it properly.

"Hey. Hmm? Why won't the zipper move?"

The zipper seems to be stuck on something. Is it overstuffed? A piece of cloth came out from a corner.

If I wanted to zip it, I guess I'd have to remove the thing that came out. Nee-san's belongings could be put into my bag instead.

While thinking that way, I unzipped it and took it out. One……Two……

I fell (A school swimsuit entered the scene).

"Out!!"

"(Startled)What did you just do!? What happened!?"

"What should I do, Yuuji!? The relative at my side is a hopeless weirdo!"

"Is, is that so……But, I feel that you, who are tightly holding onto a school swimsuit, seem more of a weirdo……"

"Eh!? That, that's not true……! This belongs to nee-san."

"I see. So you're interested in your sister's swimsuit. You're absolutely hopeless."

"You……! Wait! Please don't look at me in disdain! It's a misunderstanding!"

"OK, I understand. Please wait. Wait till I remove you from my phone contacts. Then, I'll patiently listen to your explanation."

"Damn you, Yuuji……! Are you saying that knowing me was a mistake……!"

"Wait, Yuuji. You can't blacklist him if you delete his number."

"Don't, Hideyoshi! Please don't downgrade me from a 'Friend' to 'Stalker', which is worse than being a stranger! It's fine if it's Yuuji, but Hideyoshi saying it deals me a hard blow."

"Ah……I'm sorry, Akira-nee-san. Can we drop by the police station before going to the beach?"

"That's wrong! We should be going to a swimsuit shop instead! There's no need to get me imprisoned in a detention house!"

"Don't worry, Akihisa. There're no swimming pool in detention houses."

"Argghhh! It's not for me, but for nee-san! Our conversation can't be more madly misunderstood!"

Why must I be regarded as a pervert!

"What is it, Aki-kun? You don't like my swimsuit?"

"I hate it! I hate it from the bottom of my heart!"

"But, didn't Aki-kun tell me 'I don't wanna feel embarrassed so please wear an attire that is less revealing'?"

"I'm sorry! Walking with a sister who is still wearing a school swimsuit at this age is even more embarrassing than walking with one who is wearing a revealing outfit!"

"??? But, won't it feel lonely for me if I'm wearing something different from everyone else's?"

"Eh? What are you trying to say, nee-san?"

"Look, aren't all of you wearing this kind of swimsuit since all of you are students? A 'School' swimsuit like this."

"Something every student wears……? Could it be, nee-san, that you wore this when you were in university……!?"

University students are still considered students. I doubt that's really the case, but this feeling of uneasiness is hard to get rid of. If it's nee-san, then it's more than possible.

I felt cold sweat forming on my back. I've never thought that I'd get shivers like these due to my sister's behaviour……!

"What are you saying, Aki-kun. Isn't university 'University'? Wouldn't it be weird to wear 'School' swimsuit?"

"That's great……! That's really great……! Even my sister, who obviously has no common sense whatsoever, is saying that I lack common sense. I'll just laugh it away……!"

We nearly spread a wrong Japanese culture to foreigners.

"Although I don't really understand, but does it make you feel relaxed?"

"Yes. I feel relaxed."

"If so, put my swimsuit back into the bag. Showing it to everyone makes me feel embarrassed."

"That's not right! Change it! Change the swimsuit! I can't accept this kind of things as your brother!"

"What you're trying to say is, this swimsuit isn't revealing enough?"

"Aaaaaah just do as you please regarding that! Just go to a beach shop or somewhere else and get a new swimsuit!"

"My, Aki-kun is really perverted and noisy. Why don't you learn from the calm Kouta-kun?"

"……Akihisa. Be responsible of your pervertedness."

"Wuaaa, Yuuji! I've been called H by Muttsurini!"

"Don't cry, Akihisa. Sometimes you call others 'idiot' too."

"I object! I'll never have my stupidity placed on the same level as Muttsurini's pervertedness!"

I'm just not as skilled in learning as everyone!

"Meh, it's really rare for Aki-kun to say this, I'll just change my swimsuit then. After all the chest area is a little tight."

"……(*drip**drip**drip*--nosebleed)"

If nee-san wasn’t driving I’d really like to grab her head and let her see the passenger seat.

“Enough……there won’t be any problem if nee-san is more self-conscious……”

I’d never thought that I’d be this tired just being on the car going to the beach.

☆

Three hours passed while we’re in the car.

At the end of this long journey, we've reached the pension. It's a good place surrounded by lush greenery where we can taste the damp air.

“Wow……the scenery is breathtaking……”

“Awesome~The breeze is so comfortable……”

“……Good scenery.”

“Sunny days are great~”

The girls who’d stepped off the car exclaimed.

Since we’re on top of a high hill, the vision’s clearer. Although the buildings were ancient, but it had already fulfilled the best conditions to enjoy the summer.

“Next. What’re we going to do? Are we going to the beach after we’ve placed our baggage?”

“Right. I somehow feel like swimming just by looking at it.”

“……(*gulp**gulp*--swallowing saliva)”

What is so enticing about the summer ocean. By just looking at it from afar, you'll feel eager to change into swimming attire and rush towards the vast sea, it's just unbelievable.

"We'll put our baggage in our room first then we'll go to the beach."

"""Yes--"""

We changed our clothes once it was decided, after twenty minutes.

"Guess we are the ones waiting for them."

"It can't be helped. It takes awhile for them to prepare their swimsuits."

"……That's great since I also need some time to prepare my tools."

Three guys waiting at the beach for girls to get changed. Even nee-san who is usually fast needs to prepare a new swimsuit, now they'll be slower.

We got under the shade of the parasol leisurely, and suddenly we heard an odd conversation from afar.

"……Ooo. Akihisa and the guys are over there. Hey--. You guys--"

"You, you! What're you doing!?"

"Hmm? Oh, it's the lifeguard. Why is your expression so weird?"

"It's not 'why'! Why aren't you wearing anything on top?"

"???What are you talking about, boy's swimsuits are usually topless."

"It's already wrong for a girl to wear boy's swimsuit! Just come here!"

"Wait, just wait! I'm a boy so it should be fine."

"As long as I'm alive, I will not allow such inadequacy here! Not only that there're a lot of children here, there're also scary guys too!"

"That's why you're mistaken! Just listen to me first--"

"If you're not going to wear a shirt, then you're forbidden to enter the swimming area! You're not allowed to take it off there too! I will keep watch with binoculars from afar!"

"I'm telling you to wait--"

I feel that the faint sound is similar to Hideyoshi's……Am I mistaken?

Everyone's so slow, I guess I'll just do some warm-ups to kill time.

"But this time, it's all thanks to Akira-nee-san."

That moment, Yuuji spoke while looking at the sea.

"Hmm? About the car?"

"That's one reason, but I’m talking about the 'impure heterosexual relationships are forbidden'. All thanks for that, Shouko have to patiently wait, I'm saved."

"Ahah, that. I think that's only for me……"

Also, nee-san probably thinks that Yuuji and Shouko are engaged.

"No, please let it be aimed at everyone. It's better this way."

"Eh~? How should I do it~?"

Just this once let me make things difficult for him.

Being begged for help by this fellow, I have no idea why I never want to promise him immediately, that's weird.

"Anything, just say what you want to say. but you'll get your retribution soon."

"Retribution?"

"By disclosing that time when you and Shimada kissed."

"I swear to God that I won't speak lightly."

I'm obviously not a heartless guy that will turn a blind eye to a friend's sincere plea.

"About that, there's another one about you getting a peck on the cheek."

"Oeh!?"

How, how did he know about it!? That time, there's only me and Himeji-san on the rooftop so it's impossible that someone had seen it!?

"No, no! The one at the rooftop, it has to be Himeji-san just greeting me! Ever since that time Himeji-san's attitude did not change, I couldn't gather the courage to ask--"

"Huh? Himeji? I thought it's the one with Shimada's little sister?"

"……Akihisa. What rooftop?"

"…………"

What should I do now? I think I just made a mistake that cannot be remedied.

"Hey, Akihisa. Are you hiding anything fun from me?"

"No no no no. There's nothing. It's just that I had dreamt of that before."

"I see. Then it'll be fine for me to ask Himeji about it?"

"Odabeba."

"Although I don't know which planet that language comes from, but I understand that you're trying to convey 'Please don't'."

"That's great that you understand……"

It may be so, but I still don't understand the meaning of Himeji-san's gesture. It might be on the cheek, but a kiss is still a kiss. I doubt that she'll do this to a person she doesn't have a feeling for. But……

"She said that, my first love is still going strong……"

"Hmm? What did you say then?"

"Ah, nothing at all. I wonder who is Himeji-san's first love."

I'm also a man. Although I'm slightly oblivious, but I will still think if Himeji-san has feelings for me. But, thinking from the 'my first love is still going strong' that I heard, it seems impossible.

"Himeji-san's first love? You can't even tell that it's actually you?"

"Ahaha. If so I'll die happily."

"……Am I wrong?"

"Wrong~……I remember during my primary school days, Himeji-san herself denied……"

Since it's my memory, it highly possible that there're some weird parts.

"I see. Urm, it's no use being concerned of the past."

"Yes. Ahaha."

"……Compared with this, that kissing part is more important."

"Absolutely."

Grr……! Muttsurini. You are usually silent but now……!

"Ah…… About that, actually--"

As I was thinking about how to slip past this and going to open my mouth

"…………!(*blink**blink*)"

Both of Muttsurini's eyes shone. And his hands are already grabbing four cameras. I guess the girls are here. Just in time.

"Look. Everyone is here. When we talk about the ocean we think of girls in swimsuits!"

"Tch. He got away."

"…………Anyway, take photos."

Muttsurini fiddled with the four cameras skillfully. I'm afraid that he's adjusting backlight correction or focus correction until his cameras are perfect. Such an unfathomable person.

☆

"Thanks for waiting. Sorry that it took us some time to change.”

The one who spoke energetically was Kudou Aiko-san. She’s wearing pants that looked like a miniskirt with slanted stripes for her lower body, and an ordinary swimsuit for the upper body, but its size was very different from the Swimming Club’s swimsuit, and it’s making me feel troubled as the sunburn marks on her shoulder and abdomen were very noticeable. Now that’s ‘summer’, wearing a straw hat that made us feel that, and it’s really cute and suit her.

“I guess you’re really from the Swimming Club. The swimsuit and hat really do suit you.”

“You think so? Thanks, Sakamoto-kun……hmm?”

“…………(*blink**blink*)”

“Ahaha. My, Muttsurini-kun. If you want to take pictures of my swimsuit just do it in front of me. I’ve always told you that I won’t get mad, right?”

“…………Don’t get too far ahead of yourself, Kudou Aiko.”

“…I have no interest in your swimsuit (platter splatter)—I've just got heatstroke.”

“Ohh, you worked hard, Muttsurini. That’s 28 seconds.”

“Amazing, Muttsurini. You've managed to create a new record for enduring a nosebleed.”

“Yoshii-kun, Sakamoto-kun. Don’t be so heartless, hurry up and save him…”

Kudou-san got closer to Muttsurini while worrying about his nosebleed that’s pouring like a tap.

“Ah, Kudou-san. If you go too close to him now—”

“…The sunlight got stronger…! (Platter Splatter)”

“Eh? Wa, wait a sec, Muttsurini-kun!? Muttsurini-kun!? Are you alright!? Your nosebleed’s like a fountain now!?”

“…Heatstrokes are hard to treat recently. (Shooosh)”

“This isn’t some kind of heatstroke but a new kind of illness, is it?”

That’s really amazing. It’s impossible to bleed that much even if we cut the carotid pulse. As expected, we can’t stand around seeing such a nosebleed.

I got over to Muttsurini, who collapsed, and talked to him slowly.

“Muttsurini.”

“……Akihisa…”

“…Your last words…”

“What are you saying, Yoshii-kun!? That’s very ominous here, you know!?”

“…When I’m reborn, I wish to become a bird…”

“Don’t just follow him, Muttsurini-kun! You’ll be saved!”

“…And then, I hope to see lots of things inside the girls' changing room from the outside…”

“And you want to do that in your rebirth!? At least understand your cause of death in this life!”

Muttsurini left with a smile on his bleeding face. You died believing in your own beliefs. I’ve received your will.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“…Kept you waiting.”

This time, it was Himeji-san and Kirishima-san, who came later than Kudou-san. The swimsuits I saw looked similar to the ones I saw at the swimming pool…but for some reason, the change of scenery gave a completely different impression.

“…Aiko, don’t bully Tsuchiya too much.”

“No, I didn’t do anything…”

Kirishima-san said to Kudou-san as she saw Muttsurini collapsed on the floor. She didn’t seem to understand why Muttsurini’s having nosebleed all over the place.

“That’s not it, Shouko-chan. Tsuchiya-kun got excited that Kudou-san looks so cute in the swimsuit. Right, Tsuchiya-kun?”

“…I don’t admit that fact.”

Muttsurini continued to deny it even in his dying breath. How dishonest.

“…Excited?”

“Yes. Tsuchiya-kun’s a boy after all.”

On hearing Himeji-san’s words, Kirishima-san nodded and walked slowly to Yuuji.

“…Yuuji.”

“Hm? What is it, Shouko?”

“…Eii (Poke)”

“GWAH!!!? (Puoosshhh)”

And so, Kirishima-san’s silverfish-like fingers were stabbed into Yuuji’s nostrils, and there was a nosebleed like a spring.

“…That’s good.”

“WHAT’S GOOD ABOUT THAT!? WHAT’S WITH THAT OUT OF A SUDDEN!? (SPLATTERR)”

“…Because you’re not excited even after seeing me in a swimsuit, Yuuji.”

I see. So that’s why she used violence. In that case, it couldn’t be helped.

But I think the nosebleed’s big enough even without doing such a thing.

“Kirishima-san and Himeji-san are both so pretty…and have nice figures…”

“Eh…!? A, Akihisa-kun!? Call, calling me pretty, it’s rather embarrassing…”

“Wah!? So, sorry! I accidentally said it out!”

Himeji-san looked like she was about to pull her pareo as she curled back.

I didn’t intend to say it. I just blurted it out accidentally!

“Hm. My figure’s not good anyway.”

This time, there seemed to be an annoyed voice from behind. It’s Minami.

“A, arre? You’ve changed already, Minami? It looks different from before…”

I looked behind, and though I couldn’t see everything as I’m wearing a hat, but Minami’s one-piece swimsuit was different from before…besides, wasn’t that a competitive swimsuit?

“Th, this is because, I want to swim properly for once! You see, I ate a lot of ice cream and drank lots of juice recently, so I put on weight already…!”

“Eh? But Minami? Didn’t you say that your chest got skinnier because you slacked around during the summer on the car?”

“My, my chest got skinnier, but my thighs got bigger—argh, I’m an idiot! Why must I emphasize on this!”

Minami ended off with these powerful words as she covered her face and sighed.

“Is, is that so? I couldn’t tell at all.”

“That’s enough, Aki…I’m of a traditional Japanese physique…even though I grew up in Germany…”

No matter what she says, I do feel that Minami’s rather charming. I guess it’s most suitable to call her a skinny beauty, the kind of fashion model that will appear in the news…but those people don’t have breasts after all.

As I’m wondering what to do, the person I feared most appeared.

“Eh? What is it, Minami-san? Why are you sitting at such a place? Did my stupid brother do something rude to you?”

The one standing right behind Minami, holding a swim ring is my sister, Yoshii Akira herself.

“Ah, it’s alright, Akira-san. I’m just grumbling a little here—hey…”

Minami turned to the owner of the voice…and just froze there.

“Minami-san?”

“…Sobs”

“Minami-san, why are you crying when you see me?”

“That’s enough…I, I can’t beat Mizuki and Akira-san ever in a lifetime…”

“???”

Nee-san tilted her head, seemingly unable to understand Minami’s words.

But speaking of which—

“That’s great…it’s really great that nee-san chose an ordinary swimsuit…”

Nee-san’s wearing a normal bikini that can be seen anywhere. There’s nothing weird about it. My heart’s finally within me again…!

“You don’t have to worry that much, Aki-kun. There’s no suitable size, so I don’t really have many options.”

“Wait, nee-san. What would you choose if you have a choice?”

And that weird tone of yours sounds like you can’t tell the difference between an ordinary and non-ordinary swimsuit.

“…Akira-san.”

“Yes, what is it, Shouko-san?”

“…Just a moment, please excuse me.”

Swoop.

Kirishima-san’s action seemed to create this word-like sound.

“? What is it, Shouko-san?”

“…Amazing…”

For some reason, Kirishima-san trembled after grabbing my sister’s breasts.

“Ah, Akira-san. Please excuse me too!”

And then, Himeji-san grabbed nee-san’s waist from the back.

“???Mizuki-san. What are you doing?”

“…No…nothing at all…it’s nothing…”

Himeji-san answered weakly and left nee-san quietly—and went over to Minami before sitting down in the same manner.

“…Sobs…”

“Ah, Mizuki…welcome…”

“Minami-chan…the sea’s, really cruel…”

“No, Mizuki. I think the cruel one is definitely God…”

Minami, whose eyes looked completely lifeless, gently cuddled Himeji-san.

Well, what’s with this funeral-like mode.

“Alright, everyone, pull yourself together. The last one is here, right?”

Kudou-san seemed like she’s trying to shake off this mood as she cheerily looked away. Her stare’s targeted at Hideyoshi, who’s walking here slowly.

“Sorry everyone…looks like I’m the last one…”

Hideyoshi sounds rather depressed compared to the weather above his head.

“What is it, Hideyoshi-kun? You look very listless.”

“Yeah. You even said energetically before this that ‘I’ll show you my most manly side!’”

“Please just let me go…”

The depressed Hideyoshi is wearing a T-shirt I’ve never seen before on his swimsuit for some reason.

☆

“You actually prepared a watermelon and a bat. That’s a nice decision you made, Akihisa.”

“Of course we need to play Watermelon Splitting. I iced it before, so it’ll definitely taste great.”

“…Nice to drink when it’s a hot weather. Looking forward to it.”

After swimming around for a while, the three of us guys here are carrying the watermelon and the bat from the pension.

“Speaking of which, it’s almost noon. We have to prepare lunch besides the watermelon too.”

“Eh? Isn’t there a lot of salt water?”

“In a certain sense, it’s amazing that you can make such a reply…”

“…I never thought you’ll live until now.”

Ahh, that’s right. It’s because nee-san’s around that I’ve been able to eat well.

“If we can create some fire, it’ll be interesting to pick some shells.”

“Oh, that’s a nice idea. We can add time to the miso soup for flavoring.”

“Then, it’ll be the seaside staples of fried noodles, curry rice, fried squid’s good too—hm? What is it, Muttsurini?”

“…There.”

On hearing Yuuji’s question, Muttsurini pointed at nee-san and the rest far away. What now? It looks like they’re talking with some people here. Does nee-san have acquaintances here?

“These are such cute girls~ what? Where are you from?”

“Ah, no. We’re, well…”

“We have our friends over there too. Want to play together? How about that pretty big sis over there?”

Himeji-san sounds rather troubled. Is this what I think…?

“They’re trying to hook up. Those girls have quite some looks, so it can’t be helped, but it’s really troublesome.”

“…Shall I eliminate them?”

I don’t know when Muttsurini readied the stungun as he gets into position. That weapon will cause a great tragedy if it’s not used wisely at the seaside.

“Ahh, well…we’re going to do it, right? It’s faster that way—”

“No, it’s fine even if we leave them alone.”

I stop Muttsurini and Yuuji as they try to hurry over. I don’t think there’s a need to really go over, and it’ll be bad if the combination of seawater and stungun happens. It’ll be better to not do any unnecessary things and watch.

“Hm? It’s fine? Why?”

“Himeji-san and the rest needs worry, but nee-san’s around. She’ll probably deal with them nicely.”

Nee-san’s abnormally attractive to those who don’t know her true nature, so she should know how to deal with those people trying to hook up with her. It’s fine.

“I’m really sorry, but we refuse.”

I can hear my sister’s voice from afar, that firm tone that would not allow herself to be forced by the other side. Hm. In that case, it’ll be fine if we don’t come out.

“Eh? Why? You have a boyfriend?”

Even so, they’re not such nice people who’ll leave just like this. They continue to harass them. Well, it’s not that I can’t understand if anyone sees how nee-san and the rest look.

In the face of such opponents, my sister makes a serious reply. Since they’re just trying to hook up, I guess there’s no need to treat them as opponents seriously.

“No. I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Eh? You don't? Lucky?. Follow us then.”

“I don’t have a boyfriend, but I have a younger brother.”

Hm? Brother? Is she referring to me? I don’t think such an excuse can be a rejection…

“Huh? A younger brother? What’s so special about that? I have a brother too, you know?”

As I expected, the opponent won’t back away because of such a thing. A younger brother’s different from a boyfriend, and even though she has a younger brother, it’s not a problem. Seriously, how is nee-san going to use this as an excuse to reject those people trying to hook up with her.

“Don’t look down on him. My brother’s relationship with me isn’t ordinary.”

“Heh? Not ordinary? What do you mean?”

“I can’t say it out loudly. Actually…(gloop gloop)”

“PER…PERVERT!!!”

Wait wait wait. What just happened!?

“Also, every day, we’ll…(buzz buzz)”

“DOES, DOES JAPANESE LAW ALLOW FOR THAT KIND OF THING!?”

I can sense that person trying to hook up shaking from afar. What in the world did my sister say to him!? Not good! If I don’t stop it soon, it’ll become really unbelievable!

I hurriedly rush over there. There’s a tingling premonition ringing inside me.

“No, it’s too early for you to be shocked. Also, based on my brother’s requests, I’ll even use a (buzz) or (gloop)— ”

“ARE YOU FOR REAL…!? PLEASE DON’T CAUSE THE COMMON SENSE WITHIN ME TO COLLAPSE…!!”

“Hold on a moment, nee-san! What are you saying!?”

“Ugh!? Ne, ‘nee-san’…? You mean this guy—”

“Well, I don’t know what you heard, but it’s all a misunderstanding.”

“YOU, YOU APPEARED! YOU DEMONIC PERVERTED LITTLE BROTHER—!! YOU’RE A BEAST THAT DOESN’T CARE ABOUT GENDER OR RELATIVES!!”

“HOLD ON A MOMENT! DON’T RUN AWAY WITH SUCH A MISUNDERSTANDING! I BEG OF YOU, PLEASE WAIT!!”

The guy hurriedly ran away. What should I do…I, probably won’t be able to use the bathhouse at this seaside next year…

“Seriously. That kind of person really troubles me a lot.”

“To me, you’re the most troublesome one, nee-san…”

It’s really great that there’s a huge difference in age between me and my sister. If I end up having to go to the same school with this kind of sister, I’ll definitely become a kid who won’t go to school.

☆

“Akihisa-kun, a little to the right!”

“Not there, Aki. It’s to the left!”

“Yoshii-kun, forward!”

I can only rely on everyone’s voices as I have a cloth tied around my eyes, covering my sight as I walk towards the watermelon. Normally, I’ll definitely trust Himeji-san’s suggestion, but when my eyes are sealed, I can’t tell if that’s the real Himeji-san or Hideyoshi’s mimicry. No, maybe Hideyoshi’s mimicking Minami. In that case, Minami may be lying to be to fool me, but it’s dangerous to think that way too.

“Aki-kun. Turn 32 degrees to the left, walk 4.7m straight in that direction.”

“…Akihisa. It’s actually the other way.”

I can hear nee-san and Muttsurini’s voices. However, everyone’s saying things while directing me to completely different directions, so I can’t tell which one is the correct one. In that case, everyone’s just leaking fake information to me, right?

In that case, I’ll just trust Yuuji’s suggestion. He’ll give fake information instead of telling the truth—that guy will say the truth while pretending to do that. With that, I’ll be able to tell where the watermelon is…!

I prick my ears to look for Yuuji’s voice. Then, what will he tell me…?

“…Yuuji. How’s this swimsuit…?”

“Even if you ask me how, I’ve seen it before. No feelings about it.”

“…You definitely didn’t look at it properly. Look closely.”

“Oi! Don’t touch me in such a getup! You’re touching me in a lot of places!”

“…Don’t worry.”

…Hoho. I see.

I gather the information I got and draw a map in my mind. The target’s 47 degrees behind me on the left, 3.4m straight down the path. If I know where the place is, I won’t hesitate in my actions again. Then, I’ll just have to swing the bat down at full strength.

“DDDIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!”

“UUUWWWWOOOHHHH!! That was close—!!”

Damn! It doesn’t feel like I hit! I missed!

“Ahh, sorry Yuuji. I mixed you up with the watermelon.”

After saying that, I take off the cloth covering my tablecloth.

The bat landed several millimetres in front of Yuuji. That bastard…! He managed to dodge it at the last minute…!

“I’d say, Akihisa…you obviously went right over at Yuuji after hearing his voice, right…?”

“Ahaha, what are you saying, Hideyoshi? That’s a huge misunderstanding.”

I definitely won’t admit such a thing.

“…Well, don’t mind, Hideyoshi. Akihisa’s just looking for the watermelon. Right, Akihisa?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

I immediately agreed with Yuuji. The guess that ‘he wanted to beat Yuuji for having a passionate hug with the pretty Kirishima-san’ really hurts me. I’m a very forgiving and understanding person here.

“Then, it’s my turn. Akihisa. Hand me the bat.”

“No no. What are you saying? Haven’t you been failing all this time?”

“Don’t say that, Akihisa. Didn’t everyone go through a round before this? It’s the second round now, isn’t it? Shouldn’t it be my turn?”

“No no no. I think it’s fair to go the other way at the second of the second round. Let me challenge again.

We continue to grab onto the bat tightly while smiling at each other. It’ll be over if I step aside here. I’ll lose the chance to cease this guy’s breathing.

“We, well, Akihisa-kun, Sakamoto-kun. It’ll be a pity to smash this rare watermelon. I think we’ll end the watermelon splitting here…”

““Don’t worry, the watermelon definitely won’t be crushed (here).””

“You guys, what are you planning on hitting…”

We’ll see after we beat it.

☆

The bloody Watermelon Splitting finally ended peacefully. It’s now noon.

The guys brought the watermelon over, so this time, the girls are to buy fried noodles and curry.

“I say, Yuuji.”

“What is it?”

“My shoulders feel a lot lighter.”

“What a coincidence, me too.”

The irritating feeling we had since just now disappeared completely. As expected, that’s…

“The jealous stares due to the girls have disappeared, right?”

“Yeah. Really, those were troublesome.”

It’s eyecatching when beauties are around, but the guys beside them will have it a little tough. I guess they’re definitely thinking that the standards between the guys and girls are different.

“Eh? Speaking of which, where’s Muttsurini?”

“Ahh. He said that he’s going somewhere to clean the camera lens.”

“Fm~m. He dirtied it with his nosebleed again, right?”

“Even so, he was running all over the place.”

“Well, that’s the guy called the Silent Pervert.”

Yuuji and I talk as we look around each other. We think about couples when we talk about seasides, but when we look at things for real here…

“It’s really unexpected to have an all-female group here.”

“Hm? That’s true. But as there’re guys trying to hook up, it’s to be expected to have women getting hooked up.”

“That’s true.”

Hooking up, hooking up…I always thought this kind of thing only happens in light novels or manga. I didn’t expect them to appear right beside me…

“Sorry to keep both of you waiting. We’re back.”

“Wel, welcome back. You spent quite some time. Were there a lot of people?”

As I was spacing out, the girls carrying different foods and drinks came back.

“No, it’s not that there were a lot of people…”

Hideyoshi mused unhappily as he carries a plastic juice bottle. Did something happen?

“People approached us again.”

“Huh? Again?”

Most likely, it’s because there were only girls. It’s better for us to go with them after all. We shouldn’t have listened to them saying “Because you guys brought the watermelon.”

“Minami-chan and Shouko-chan were bullied quite a lot especially just now. It was really annoying.”

Himeji-san gave a wry look at Minami and Kirishima-san.

“Really, this is the one thing I really~ can’t deal with…”

“…I’m, scared too.”

Those two who were harassed showed tired expressions.

“Well~ that was tough on you.”

“Can’t you just deal with them using your normal strength?”

Yuuji and I reach our hands out to grab the things in both people’s hands.

“Hey hey, that kind of attitude won’t do, Yoshii-kun, Sakamoto-kun.”

PAK. Kudou-san reached her hands out to grab our hands.

“Even if you say that it’s this kind of attitude we’re showing…”

“What’s not right about it?”

“What’s not right—haa…you two really don’t understand a woman’s heart…”

Kudou-san gives an exaggerated expression as she says.

I find that there should be no problems with nee-san around…an unhappy voice butts in before I can say that.

“Aki, are you saying that you won’t mind even if I’m troubled?”

“I find that a little cold, Akihisa-kun.”

“Ah, no, I don’t mean it that way…”

Minami and Himeji-san are looking right at me. I don’t have that intention, but just that I find that there’s no need to worry…

“…Yuuji.”

“Hm?”

“…Yuuji, you should be more jealous and worried.”

“I’m worrying in my own way OW OW OW! Hold on a moment! I don’t understand what you want from me!”

“…I’ll teach you until you understand…bodily.”

“GUUUAAAHHHH!!!”

Kirishima-san is showing her feelings in a straightforward manner as she angrily unleashed her rage on Yuuji.

“Yeah. Aki and the rest should be more worried about us.”

“Yeah…it doesn’t feel too good if they’re not even a little jealous…”

“Then, let’s make him worry a little. Maybe he'll understand.”

“Okay, let’s try to be a little bad.”

“Hm? What’s the matter, Himeji-san, Minami?”

Minami and Himeji-san beside me are muttering something to each other. What are they talking about?

“Hey, Mizuki. It’s not good if such people pop up randomly.”

“Right. It’s not good.”

Why must Minami and Himeji-san say such things to me?

“EH? Do you often get requests, Minami, Himeji-san?”

I never heard of it up till now.

“Yeah. Well, there’s a lot of times!”

“Yes. Well, anytime!”

Both of them emphasized this in a weird way.

“But your reactions just now don’t seem like you’re used to it…”

“Tha, that’s not true! We’re so scared that we couldn’t even let out our voices!”

“Tha, that’s right! It’s like what Mizuki said! You’re unable to understand when you’re an airhead and have no luck with love!”

Ugh. How rude, calling me an airhead and having no chance with love.

“That’s not true! Even if I want to hook up some girls, it’s rather easy—”

“Akihisa-kun, what do you mean by easy?”

“Aki? What’s easy?”

Why is it that I feel that I’ll be killed if I say that ‘I can easily do something like hooking up girls’?

“Well, easy, as in…”

“Are you saying that you can do it? Akihisa-kun?”

“What are you saying, Aki? It’s impossible for you to get any girls, right?”

“Mm.”

“That’s right. It’s not like you to go get some girls, and it’s impossible for you to do so. You can’t bluff.”

“Mmm.”

“Aki-kun. People have things they’re suited and not suited to do. You’re not suited for love at all, so I think that your relationships with the other gender will only be at the friend level.”

“Mmmm.”

Even nee-san interrupted as she eavesdrops on us.

It’s really pitiful of me to be told off like that. Even I can still try to get girls…!

“…Even you too, Yuuji. You don’t understand what girls think…that’s why you’re not popular.”

“Ku…! You actually said it…!”

Yuuji groaned as Kirishima-san pinched his face. It’s amazing that he can still talk in such a situation.

“Really, you have to reflect on this, Akihisa-kun, Sakamoto-kun? Prez too, forgive them for this. The drinks we bought will become warm, you know?”

On hearing Kudou-san’s words, Kirishima-san grudgingly lets go of Yuuji’s face.

(Damn it, I just can’t accept it.)

(Yeah. It’s ridiculous that they’re angry at us.)

I grumbled to Yuuji, who’s released. Did we really do something to anger them?

(And they’re throwing tantrums over how they’re being pursued? Why are they calling us cold-hearted? Impossible.)

(Yeah. They’re just blindly saying that I’m not suitable for love. If I show my stuff, I can do—)

Anything. As I was about to say this, I see something around my friend. That’s…a rare scene Muttsurini coming back while holding a camera and talking to unfamiliar people. Who’s he talking to?

“I say, you’re holding a good camera.”

“…???”

“If possible, can you take a photo of me too?”

“…Sure, no problems.”

“Really? Thank you.”

“Ah, that’s right, Have a picture with us too? How about a summer memory?”

“Ahaha. That’s fine too. This kid looks rather cute.”

“GUOH!”

“Wha, what is it, Akihisa!? What did you just see!?”

A blood-cough inducing scene happens right in front of me.

How, how is that possible…! Such a…thing…!

“Pull yourself through, Akihisa! What did you just see!?”

“He…hooked up…”

“Huh? What are you saying?”

“Muttsurini…got hooked up, by some girls…!”

“Har? What nonsense are you saying. At least say something with common sense when you dream—”

“Wow. You’re really a photography genius, you know!?”

“Amazing! It’s well taken!”

“…Just, an ordinary skill.”

“You’re at it again. You’re rather cute when you’re shy.”

“GUOAH!!”

Blood came out of Yuuji’s mouth.

“Im, impossible…! Why, not us but Muttsurini…!”

“Impossible, this is impossible…”

Unbelievable. No, I don’t want to believe!

“…Well, Yuuji.”

“What…?”

“If, just if.”

“Yeah.”

That’s right. One out of ten thousand. One out of hundred million. I find it impossible, and it’s definitely an illusion, but maybe—

“Are we the only ones amongst the gang who haven’t had anyone hooking up to us…!?”

“Don, don’t say such stupid things! How can there be such a thing!”

“Tha, that’s right! That’s impossible! What am I saying!”

“Right!? At least think some more no matter how stupid you are!”

Yuuji and I let out dry laughter as we break out cold sweat. Right. I’m just thinking too much! Ahaha, ahahahaha.

………………But.

“Then, why hasn’t anyone talked to us.”

“Gu…”

The girls got talked to twice in such a short time. If that’s the case, we can say that there’s a difference in acceptance levels between guys and girls…but it’s completely different if even Muttsurini’s talked up by a girl.

“As expected, it’s just like what nee-san said. I’m a kid no one likes…”

At that time, I had been thinking that I might be popular if I’m a little taller and build up some muscles. So it can’t work…?

“No no, calm down, Akihisa. Leaving aside the girls, doesn’t Muttsurini look silent and harmless on first glance? He’s just easy to talk to.”

“Well, it’s true that Muttsurini’s of a completely different type from us.”

If I have to say it, it’s his silence and stealth action.

“Yeah, so it’s too early to decide if we’re popular or not. Leaving aside you, how is it possible for me not to be popular?”

“Ye, yeah. We’re just the types who’re hard to hook up with, so it’s not like we’re not popular at all!”

“That’s right! We haven’t had girls talking to us, but it’s definitely easy for us to hook up girls if we’re serious!”

“That’s right! What do they mean by ‘you have no reason to get hooked up’! I’ll show them!”

“That’s the spirit, Akihisa! Just like that, we’ll show them how we’re like when we’re serious!”

“Yeah! Let’s show everyone how popular we can be when we’re serious! I won’t let them think that we’re not popular!”

“Right right!”

As so, Yuuji and I head to the beach to hook up some girls to protect our prides.

And after that, when we looked back at it, we—could only call ourselves mad at that time.

☆

“Speaking of which…have you ever hooked up someone before, Yuuji?”

“Not at all.”

“Me too…”

Yuuji and I are looking for targets on the beach. We’ll only create quarrels with guys around, so we aim for girls only groups. Also, if there’re two of them, the number will be just right. The problem will be about ‘how should we begin’.

“But you don’t have to worry about that so much, Akihisa. Just follow those that succeed and we’ll be fine.”

“Follow? As in, we imitate those we see?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

Imitate, imitate…

“Then, from who?”

“Didn’t you see it just now? How Muttsurini got hooked up by girls?”

“Ah. That’s right. That looks like a successful example.”

Even though the other party was the one that approached them, a success is a success, and this a big success. We’re not the same type as him (this is very important), and even if we can’t do so, we’ll be able to hook up successfully if we follow what he does.

“In other words, aim for those who intend to take photos?”

“Yeah. There’re a lot of people who want to leave some memories at a tourist spot. We’ll just have to look for a group with girls only and have cameras.”

Fm fm, I see. It’s really a great idea.

“But will there be a group who’ll agree to our request like that?”

“Isn’t the first step of trying to hook up the first step? There’s no other way. Let’s do it before talking.”

“Well, you’re right.”

First, we look around the coast. There…doesn’t seem to be such a group around. A group of girls intending to take photos…

“Any luck, Akihisa?”

“None…none at all…what about you?”

“Me too.”

Yuuji and I have our eyes widened like plates as we look for targets.

We can’t find such a nice group.

“It’s not that easy after all.”

“Trying to hook up is probably like this. Don’t mind. Just find the type of person that matches your interests. It should be rather easy after that.”

“Yeah. There’s nothing difficult besides looking for targets.”

We continue to look around as we move. If we can find anyone that fits us, we’ll just talk to them by saying ‘do you mind us taking photos for you’? And then, we’ll ask subtlely ‘where’re you from’ to continue the conversation. If we can create a start to this conversation, things will proceed smoothly. That’s right, the biggest problem is to find the chance to talk.

And then, as I consider this, I think,

The biggest problem is ‘how to find a chance to talk’. Then—how about someone else continues instead of the person talking? What should the person do? With what?

“…Maybe…”

The one who’s approaching should have rather different conditions from the one continuing the conversation. Besides, there’s no problem for the first person to start the conversation, but it’ll be disadvantageous if the other person tries to talk. In the worst case, one side will fail, while the other side will succeed. Things will probably end up like that.

I really like the situation where I succeed while Yuuji fails. That will be the best situation.

—But, if, just if, what if that situation’s reversed…! The thought alone is scary.

“…”

I look aside, and Yuuji looks like he’s thinking about a plan too. Is that guy thinking about the same thing as me…?

“Wha, what is it, Akihisa? What’s with that ‘I feel this is a bad situation’ look on your face?”

“Ah, ahaha. What are you saying, Yuuji? It’s just your imagination. You’re giving that ‘I’m going to get mine stolen’ look on your face too, you know?”

“Don, don’t say such stupid things. I never thought about such a thing in my mind up till now in this life of mine.”

Yuuji and I grin at each other.

Yeah. It’s not good to steal. It’s really stupid to break friendships just to hook up with others. Even if I do that, I won’t get any—

“I’m taking it then~ Here, a smile. Eh?”

“Hm? What is it?”

“Sorry~ the memory card’s full~ I’ll delete a few now. Please wait~”

“Really, you should have said so earlier~”

““UOOOOHHHH!!!””

On hearing that, we immediately sprinted on the beach. My body, please be as light as a feather now!

“YOU BASTARD, AKIHISA! WHY ARE YOU RUNNING SO FAST!? JUST RUN BEHIND ME!”

“WHY ARE YOU RUNNING SO FAST, YUUJI!? IT’S UGLY TO SEE YOU UNCOMPOSED! YOU’RE FAR BELOW ME, SO JUST FOLLOW ME FROM BEHIND! I’LL START THE CONVERSATION FIRST!”

“NO~! I DON’T BELIEVE IN WHATEVER YOU DO! LEAVE IT TO ME HERE!”

“KUH! YOU WISH!”

Yuuji and I continue to argue with each other as we dash. We’re not used to running on the beach, and as expected, it’s as hard to run on it as we imagined. But the conditions are equal…! Anyway, hurry up and run…!

“Kept you waiting! I’ll take a photo~”

“Okay~”

“Better take it well this time~”

““UOOHHHH!!!””

We, we made it! They haven’t finished!

Now, I just have to take the photo before Yuuji arrives.

“Hah hah hah…onee-sans…haa haa…you’re very pretty…”

“Hah hah hah…if possible…haa haa…please let me take a photo, haa haa…of you in swimsuits…”

“No…haa haa…I’ll take it…haa haa, for you…haa haa.”

“““……”””

☆

“…To think, that they’ll actually call the cops…”

“…What exactly…was wrong with that…”

It was such a rare chance, but those big sisters’ reactions were extremely cold. If it wasn’t for the fact that we made the snap decision to run away, we might be eating pork chop rice in the interrogation room.

“Maybe it’s hard to get into a conversation by asking to take a photo. Look, unlike Muttsurini, that’s no way we’re suited to hold a camera.”

“That’s true. We don’t look like people who’ll take pictures well.”

That’s right. That’s definitely the case. It’s not that we’re not popular.

“Then, let’s change our method of approaching our targets.”

“That’ll be a better idea.”

Yuuji and I aren’t suited to take photos. Then, we might have better luck using another method instead of doing such a thing that requires skill.

“Right! Let’s do this.”

After thinking for a while, Yuuji claps his hands.

“Hm? You thought of a good idea?”

“Yeah. Leave it to me.”

Yuuji stands proudly as he guarantees. As expected of a man reliable in such a situation.

“Listen up, Akihisa. Everyone, not just women alone, like to be praised for being good looking, right?”

“Well, you’re right. They’ll definitely not be angry if they’re praised.”

“So, we’ll first praise their looks, and then find a chance to be intimate with them. How about it?”

“Ohh, I see. So we praise them for being pretty, right?”

“Ahh. But normal praise alone won’t work. We won’t be able to develop on the topic in that case. Things like ‘you look like an actress’ or ‘like a model’ will work—just say anything that can be a form of praise.”

A metaphor or something, huh? Hm~…in other words, to emphasize on the strong points well? Can I do that?

“Then, let’s practice for a while. Let’s see…as for the girls over there, if you praise them, what will you say to them?”

Yuuji points at a couple walking who look like university students on the beach, the girl; let’s see, she’s rather slim, is wearing shades, and has a nice tan body.

“Looks as cool as a beach volleyball player. How about that?”

“That’s right. I’m thinking about that too. Then, what about there?”

This time, Yuuji points at a big sister under the umbrella. She’s wearing a white parka on top and a pareo at the bottom. Let’s see, as for that person…

“looks like she’s a princess avoiding the heat here.”

“Yeah. You’re right. I feel the same.”

I see. So that’s how we praise someone. Now that we learn how to do so, this might work.

“Not bad. Can we use this strategy?”

“Of course.”

Yuuji nods as he stands up. The tactic’s perfect.

“And so, the problem is the chance to talk—eh?”

Perfect timing. There’re two girls walking in front of us, and they dropped their towels. This is a rare opportunity!

“We, well, onee-sans! You dropped your towels!”

I immediately call out to them and shout at them. I’m definitely stammering because of thirst, not nervousness!

“Eh? Ah, really. Thanks for helping us pick them up.”

“No no, it’s just a small favor.”

I hand the towel I pick up to the onee-sans. Using this chance, we stare at their faces intently. What can we say about them? What can we praise about them…!

“Well~ speaking of which, you’re rather pretty, onee-sans.”

Yuuji says these appropriate words for now to hold the situation. Now we can find time to look for metaphors.

“Eh? Re, really?”

“What? Are you, trying to approach us?”

The onee-sans didn’t show disgusted looks. It feels good. This chance…we definitely won’t let this chance get away.

I have to notice the parts I should praise appropriately. Yuuji gives me this hint. The good things these two have are is here!

“Well, both of you look good, like models.”

“Me too. Both of you have nice figures.”

Yuuji and I continue to praise them. These two big sisters have large breasts. We have to praise them here.

“Really, such sweet tongues~”

“You’re high school students, right? You’re rather good at trying to talk people up even though you’re not grown up yet.”

The impression they give feels even gentler. It’s perfect up till now. Now, if we can finish it off perfectly with a metaphor.

“No no, this isn’t just some random bluffing.”

“No. we really think of it this way.”

“Yeah, that’s true. Your figures are really great, onee-san, just like—”

We take deep breaths, and say the decisive line in unison.

““JUST LIKE NAKED MODELS IN ERO BOOKS!!””

☆

“…The one on the right must be thinking of conquering the world.”

“…Definitely right. Those two onee-sans will definitely become world champions in the future.”

Right now, our lower jaw and legs are still trembling. This is the first time we’re beaten by women we met for the first time.

Yuuji and I are sitting together at the beach, hugging our knees in as we watch the sunset.

“Eh? Akihisa-kun, Sakamoto-kun? Why weren’t you around just now? What were both of you doing?”

“Wow, your faces are swollen. What exactly happened?”

“…Did you fall?”

Himeji-san, Minami and Kirishima-san are walking by. This, this is bad…it’s too unlucky for us if things are revealed before we can hook up any girl.

“It, it’s nothing, right Yuuji?”

“Oh, ohh…just a little tripover, right, Akihisa?”

“““…”””

The three sets of eyes are staring at us intently. This is dangerous.

“Then, Yuuji, it’s about time to see who swims faster!”

“Yeah, Akihisa! I won’t lose this time!”

“Ahaha. Well, swimming’s fun!”

“Right? Then, let’s begin!”

“Yeah!”

“““……”””

The piercing stares behind us are really painful.

—30 minutes later—

“It was going well just now. Who asked you to say unnecessary things just now, Yuuji!?”

“No~pe, that’s not true! It’s because you spouted nonsense!”

“No! It’s because you ruined it by saying ridiculous things, Yuuji!”

“Don’t try to worm your way out of this, you idiot!”

“What did you say, you piece of scum!?”

After that, we tried talking up several groups, but there were no success at all as the failures continued to pile up.

“…Oi, let’s stop. There’s not going to be an outcome to our arguing.”

“…Yeah, this is meaningless in the first place.”

We put down our hands that were grabbing each other. This isn’t the problem now.

“Hey, Akihisa, I just thought of something.”

“What?”

“Maybe the reason we didn’t succeed is because we weren’t going serious just now?”

“You’re saying?”

“Those people don’t fit our tastes, so we subconsciously kept our strength for failure. Isn’t that the case?”

“Eh? Is that so?”

“Ahh, that’s the super-ego.”

Super-ego. All…it feels really inexplicable to hear such a difficult term as the reason, and sure sounds like it.

“Then, what should we do?”

“Just look for those who’re our type?”

Hm…our type…it’s tough for me. I don’t even understand fully what’s the type I like…

“Just kidding. To be honest, it’s really too bad to use this as an excuse.”

“Well, yeah. It’s not like us to say that we didn’t do our best at this stage.”

“Yeah…right, let’s challenge another group like a man, and give up if we fail.”

“Yeah, that’s right. It’s about time for us to head back to everyone.”

We’re moving at a high pace now, but even so, it’s been an hour since we came out. We came out running because we were angry, but it’s rare to be here with everyone. It’ll be a waste to do such a thing here. Time to give up soon.

“Then, let’s walk around and find people suited to us.”

“Right.”

We step on the sand and walk towards where everyone’s gathered.

It’s because of the people calling the police that we found ourselves running to a rather far place before we knew it. there’s not a lot of people around, and we probably won’t spend much time going back.

“Really…so we’re not popular men in the end. I really don’t want to admit it.”

“Well, I sort of guessed it in the beginning.”

People’s been telling us this since before. These incidents reinforce that fact, so the impact isn’t as great here.

“Let’s treat this as a good lesson—hm?”

“? What is it, Yuuji?”

Yuuji, who has his hands cupped behind his head, suddenly stops. He’s staring at the front. Who’s there.

I follow Yuuji’s stare, and see two girls there.

“Heh~ those are nice cute girls~”

The two girls look rather tall and slender. They should be of our ages, right?

“The final battle will be against those two!”

Yuuji says excitedly to me.

One of them is a nice beauty with thin eyes and chestnut-colored hair tied at the back, while the other one is a cute girl with hair left at the waist. I don’t know their figures as they’re wearing parkas and haoris, but at least we know that they don’t look too fat or too skinny.

“Well, these people are most suited as our final opponents.”

It can’t be helped if we fail against that kind of opposition. It’s best if we want to make a retreat here.

“Then, let’s go. Oii, those two!”

After saying that, Yuuji immediately runs over to those two. He sure looks rather motivated. Do they suit his tastes?

In order not to lose the chance, I too follow Yuuji as I strut over.

“Eh? What is it?”

“Is there something?”

We hear their responses. It sounds different from the cold impression they give. Both of them sound really cute, and for some reason, a little unexpected.

“Ah…well, we came to the seaside to play, so we got lost.”

There aren’t people around, so we’re asking for help like lost kids. It looks like this is the plan. I see, let me help out here.

“Then, we’re looking for the sea. Do you know where it is?”

My voice sounds weird because I’m too tense. Uu…I did it several times, but maybe I’m not suited to do this kind of thing…

“Eh? The sea. I think you can see it from here, no?”

“You’re weird~ are you thinking of approaching us?”

Giggles. Both of them laughed. Huh? That’s an unexpectedly nice impression.

“It can’t be helped then. We’ll bring you to the seaside. Let’s hold hands. We’ll bring you there.”

After saying that, the chestnut-colored hair girl grabs Yuuji’s hand.

“Eh? Ahh, no! We’re not saying that you have to do this!”

Yuuji is flabbergasted by the sudden intimate action. I guess he’s shocked by the unexpected development.”

“Then, let me hold your hand and lead you there too.”

The other person speaks up too. For some reason, she trembles and reaches her hand out to me.

“EH? The, there’s no need for you to do this just for me, right?”

I can’t help but take a step away.

Wha, what’s with this situation? What’s going on? Is this where they contact the yakuza to drag us to a no-man-place and deal with us there?

I look at the person’s face, trying my best to understand her intention, but the eyes hidden under the bangs aren’t looking at me, so I can’t tell what she’s thinking. She sounds energetic, but is very introverted.

“Don’t be scared, alright? Let’s hold hands~”

After saying some really weird words, that girl reaches her hand out to my arm. Why is it that she’s holding my arm now!?

“Here here, don’t be shy. Alright, we’re going down the sea, alright?”

“Eh? Ah, hold on.”

“Okay okay. Let’s go into the water~”

I’m brought to the seaside as I didn’t even have the chance to refuse. I look aside, and beside me, Yuuji nearby is in the water.

Anyway, let’s meet up. I think of heading to Yuuji.

But the girl pulling my hand suddenly stops.

I turn to look at her. So she can’t really swim?

“No, it’s nothing. Just go to the sea then~”

She sounds rather energetic, but why is she just standing there?? It feels weird.

“Hey, are you feeling alright? Or is it—”

That something’s bothering you? As I’m about to ask this question, I can see Yuuji and the other girl.

“Oh, what is it? The hair color faded…eh? It’s black?”

The tip of the hair entered the sea, and the color changed. That girl’s hair changed from the chestnut color to a pretty pitch black.

Eh? The hair color just changed. That means the color’s sprayed over or something? Why must she do that?

“…My hair color’s normally black.”

Suddenly, the girl’s tone changed. That’s—a clear voice from the valedictorian I often hear.

That’s right. Our valedictorian. In other words, she’s one of my friends—Kirishima Shouko-san.

Is that so? So that’s how it is. It’s no wonder why she’s so pretty. I wondered why Yuuji was so motivated. It can’t be helped if it’s Kirishima-san—

“Kirishima-san!? How is it possible!? Why is she here!?”

Was she following us when we met!? Were our acts seen through!? Is this girl pulling my hand an assassin!? But this girl doesn’t look like Himeji-san or Minami or nee-san or Kudou-san, and the voice isn’t like theirs. Did they ask someone else for help!?

As I look flustered, that person slowly says,

“…The speaker will enter the water if I go in further.”

That voice belongs to a very close friend of mine.

“……Eh?”

“…I’ll be troubled if the equipment’s spoiled.”

This tone, this voice; is this person—

“……Don’t tell me…Muttsu…rini…!?”

“…(Nods).”

The person, who nods and takes off the wig, is my classmate in disguise.

“The, then, the voice just now is?”

“Sorry Akihisa. It’s me.”

If I had noticed it properly, I can find that the voice came from the collar of Muttsurini’s parka. Ahh, is that so? So he doesn’t want the speaker to enter the water.

In that case, this guy’s pretending to have faulty equipment and even asked Hideyoshi to voice over, dressed himself up in a female outfit, and push Yuuji and me into a trap. There’s no benefit to Muttsurini himself for doing this.

“Muttsurini…why, must you do such a thing…?”

How is it that our friends would trap us like this without benefit? This guy may be a pervert, but he’s someone who’ll definitely not do such things.

On hearing my sullen question, Muttsurini lowers his head and answers,

“…If I refuse, I feel that I’ll be killed…!”

That moment of chilling feeling doesn’t look like it’s my imagination.

“Ha…haha, ha…is that, is that so…?”

So even the assistant Muttsurini feels that he’ll be killed…

I can’t help but look over at Yuuji. I can’t see Kirishima-san’s expression, but I can see it clearly from Yuuji’s stoned expression.

“…Yuuji.”

“……Yes.”

“…Seiza”

“Eh? Seiza…it doesn’t seem appropriate at such a place.”

“…Seiza.”

“Well. This is the middle of the sea. I’ll end up drinking seawater if you make me sit in a seiza position here.”

“……How many times do you want me to repeat it?”

“…I’ll do it.”

Ploop. Even Yuuji’s head is dipped in water. Kirishima-san then gently presses her hand on his head.

I see. So our acts were revealed…

“Hey, Muttsurini.”

“…What is it?”

“Nee-san and the rest, they’re angry, aren’t they?”

“…One right hand, she said.”

“…Is that so…”

One right hand…ugh…looks like it will hurt…no, I don’t want to go back…

“…Anything can be broken except for that one right hand.”

“……(Splatter)”

“…Akihisa. This world isn’t so kind so as to forgive you even if you cry.”

Muttsurini doesn’t have any intention of letting me go as I struggle. Looks like this guy will be punished if he lets me get away. I can see from how he’s grabbing me with unnatural strength.

“Akihisa-kun, you should hurry back now, alright?”

“Ich freue mich darauf, Sie sehr zu treffen. Bereiten Sie sich bitte cor zu sterben, Aki?”

“Aki-kun. Nee-san’s really sad…that she’s going to lose a little brother.”

“Hu, hurry up and run away, Yoshii-kun! These three really want to—”

Buzz. Kudou-san’s voice disappears from the speaker before she can finish.

“Hey, Muttsurini.”

“…What?”

“Didn’t you say you want the 2000 ero books?”

“…I value my life more than that.”

“Ahh, you really like to joke around. Aren’t you a man amongst man who will bet your life on ero?”

“…I’m wearing a girl’s outfit now.”

“No no, that’s just the appearance. Your true nature isn’t like that, Muttsurini.”

“……Akihisa. It was nice knowing you."

“WHAT’S WITH THAT FAREWELL LINE OF YOURS!? OF COURSE YOU’RE GLAD! TOMORROW, THE DAY AFTER, I’LL CONTINUE LIVING HAPPILY FROM TODAY ONWARDS! I’LL BE HAPPY IF I CAN LIVE!”

“…That’s, right……! ……I…feel, the same…!”

“DON’T CRY, MUTTSURINI! WHY MUST YOU SHED MANLY TEARS HERE!? YOU MIGHT AS WELL LET ME GO HERE IF YOU’RE WILLING TO CRY! DAMN, DAMN IT! WHAT’S WITH THIS MONSTROUS KILLER COAST!? I MIGHT AS WELL END UP BARRICADED WWAAAHHHHH!? THEY’RE HERE!? SOMEONE’S SWIMMING OVER REALLY FAST!!! ”

“…Farewell, Akihisa.”

The seabed was so dark, so silent—so cold.