Chapter 89 Ready Or Not
"Tu dum, tu dum." Scarlet could hear the loud beating of her own heart. She suddenly did not feel ready, granted that his kiss had aroused her she did not feel ready to act upon her deepest impulses. If she did this, there was no turning back. She was panicking and if she kept it up she would soon be hyperventilating. What she needed to do was relax and think rationally about what was stopping her from going forward.
Maybe, she thought it was the lack of any kind of prior relationship to this, as Su Yang she used to be a strong believer in love and giving herself to the one she loved. But the one she loved had betrayed her and her ideas on romance were now jaded. But if she gave herself to Esong without loving him, what did it mean for her?
"Why are you hesitant?" Esong asked, his mouth was so close to ear that when he spoke his warm breath tickled her. "Why are you afraid to deny us both something that we both want." he asked persistently.
"I am not ready." she blurted out. The beating of her heart was increasing and so was her breath. "I am sorry Esong but I do not feel ready, right now I feel like this is too much too soon." she added.
He spun her around to look at him and she saw a flame of anger in his eyes.
"We have an agreement." he said.
"I know." she said in a soft voice. "And I am not going to break it but I want ….." she stopped talking. Even she did not know what she wanted at that moment.
"What?" he raised his hand to her hair slowly and pulled the small black hair tie that was holding her hair up. Her hair fell down to her back and he run his fingers through it slowly, drawing a few strands to his nose and he smelled them deeply. "What do you want Scarlet? More flowers, another date or more conversations where I talk about my childhood and school days. Should I talk about my adventures as a mecha warrior with you under the stars? Will that make you ready because I am ready."
He grabbed her waist and pulled her roughly against his body so that she could feel just how ready he was.
"I don't understand you, we have already had sex once before and I am sure that you remember every little detail. What is it now that is making you hesitate?"
"Shut up." she suddenly said to him.
"Huh." he was perplexed.
"I just need a minute to think and you keep touching me and whispering into my ears and kissing my neck and I cannot think right. I just....I need control Esong, I am afraid of what losing control with you will do to me so maybe we can start slow. Just kissing, let's get a bit familiar and comfortable with each other."
"Comfortable is for lovers." he replied.
"Which is what we are." she answered. "We are married but also not married in the sense that our marriage does not serve it's purpose. We are also not friends, at best we are considered acquaintances. I want to request you for at least one week of kissing and a few more friendly dates. Our first date has been a disaster Esong, you may not know it because you have not taken anyone out on a date before but ours was a bad date."
Esong looked at her and he snorted derisively. "Now you want more concessions." he said.
"Yes." she stood her ground. "We agreed that we can add more terms to the contract."
"The terms have to be agreed to by both parties." he responded.
"Then agree to this." she said seriously.
"That sounds like an order, you do not give me orders." he said sternly. He walked past her and sat own on his bed.
"It's not an order it's a request." she turned around again to face his new position.
"You did not say please." he responded." he looked at her with arrogance, waiting for those words to fall out of her mouth.
"Should I get down on my knees while I am at it?" she challenged his angry gaze. There was a part of her that was boiling, she wanted to just shake him like a tree and take some of that pride and arrogance that had been carved into him out of his body.
Esong could not believe that they had gone from almost ripping clothes to here. The problem, he thought was that her brain worked too much. She was always thinking and calculating, what she needed to do was shut it off for a while and just go with the flow.
"Message from the RGB." a buzzing of his bracelet followed that mechanical voice. He looked at his bracelet, read the message and frowned.
Scarlet was watching him and the brief interruption of him reading a message allowed her to calm down a bit. There was nowhere to sit in the bedroom so she sat down on his bed, next to his long legs.
"Those maids have been sentenced they will serve five years on the Red planet in the mines."
Scarlet remembered the maids, she just hadn't followed up the case because she could not attend the trials. "Good, next time they will think twice before laying a hand on any child. Why did you frown though, if that's what the message is about then it's good news."
Esong crossed one leg over the other and he said, "Something else is bothering me, it's mecha warrior business."
She could not ask about mechs warrior business as she was not one.
He sat up abruptly and quickly, as if there was a spring in the bed which had just tried to evict him. Then he looked at her and used his hand to turn her face so that she could look at him.
"This is the last time we get to make concessions, I will not be giving in to your whims anymore."
"They are not..."
"I will not be giving in to your whims again, since you want one week of just kissing and more dates I will give it to you. But I have my own terms to add. One, our contract will be extended from one year to infinity."
"What?" she looked at him with disbelief in her eyes.