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Chapter Four: Piercing Betrayal (R-18)
Chapter Four: Piercing Betrayal (R-18)
“Hmmm... Mmmmm....”
A female voice moaning in pleasure fluttered into my ears as my eyes opened. It was morning; that much was clear by the sun flickering in through the balcony windows. I wasn’t in my assigned closet, so I must’ve not woken up from this nightmare.
I was still in this new world.
A sigh escaped my lips as I leaned up and swung my legs off my bed. Since my sight was still hazy and not at all adjusted, I didn’t immediately notice the woman standing over me. I was eye to eye with her bare stomach as she erotically touched herself. I looked up, my eyes going past her naked breasts to a face flushed red with heat, finally stopping at the pair of fluffy, pointy ears on her brown hair. A tail danced around her backside, swaying side to side as she licked her lips. A hand reached out and grabbed my shoulder, and that’s when I realized I was naked myself.
Did it matter?
The masturbating girl looked at me expectantly, but I had no intention of doing anything. It was never possible for me to get an erection in my old world. Even when Will had printed out some of his favorite vintage magazines and shared them around, I didn’t see the appeal of it.
I didn’t know what it was. But the more I looked at it, the less I felt. Even after taking it home, I tried to touch myself. I tried for hours, but it was like I was incapable of feeling anything even resembling pleasure. Even spitting on my penis and rubbing it that way just ended in me simply touching something that was a part of me.
In my world, I was broken. In this world, I’m broken. It seems like I’m destined to be broken no matter where I go...
When I stood up, the Beastfolk grabbed my penis and threw me to the bed. I bounced up, remaining frozen as she hungrily licked her lips and kissed my stomach, her head traveling down my scarred body until coming to my flaccid penis.
“Lord Meruria paid me to make you a man, Lord Shuuta. Let me bring you to heaven. Even with a pathetic dick like that, you’ll blossom into a beautiful flower.”
I remained silent and totally still.
Maybe she’ll go away… I hope she’ll go—
I didn’t have time to finish my thoughts before she used me like a pleasure doll. I was frozen and terrified, and the fear only increased when she used my body as a toy, growing increasingly angrier when I showed no signs of reacting. Maybe she thought the cold embrace of death would do something, so she wrapped her hands around my throat and squeezed.
The HP bar… It’s…draining…
Right when suffocation was about to take me, the girl quivered, moaned, and rolled off me while furiously fingering herself.
I curled into a small ball, released the anguish from my soul, wailed until my very soul started to tremble and quiver, and darkness found fit to take me once again when I heard footsteps stomp right outside my door.
“SHUUTA!!!!” Greggie screamed after Quella used [Fireball] to burn down the locked door. They didn’t have the key, so breaking it down was the only option. He smashed through the smoldering remains to find his close friend curled into a small ball with a damp blanket covering his body. A strange woman with animal features was humping his weeping face. “GET AWAY FROM HIM!”
Elly and Ami were frozen solid by the sexual assault happening in front of them. Before Ms. Mary or Quella could act, their summoner materialized in front of the bed, preventing Greggie from getting any closer after she wrapped his arms and legs with a binding spell. Calling the beastfolk, she skipped to Meruria's side after getting her clothes and dressed without any shame.
“It seems to me that he does not have the qualifications to achieve Soul Evolution. Therefore, I have decided his future,” Meruria said. Upon hearing words of protest from the seven that wanted to save Shuuta, Meruria slammed her staff into the circle and used a mass teleportation spell to summon all of Class 2-F, barring Lori and Ann since they had left the church, to Shuuta’s room. It was certainly large enough to handle the number of bodies. Besides, she hadn’t had a chance to set up the courtroom.
“What? This trial thing is happening already?” Damon asked, raising his arms up to stretch. He was shirtless because he was in the middle of working out. A layer of sweat dripped down his toned, muscular body.
“Lord Meruria, why is he like that? Who is that woman? What did she do to him?!” Quella demanded, showing a fiery passion. She tried to move, but magical bindings appeared on her and the rest of Team Quella.
“She is Shuuta’s trial. He must conquer his trauma if he wishes to achieve Soul Evolution. I expected you to figure this out, but I am disappointed you didn’t,” Meruria said.
Meruria channeled a telekinesis spell through her staff. She tightly wound the damp blanket around Shuuta's body, then lifted him into the air. Only his head was visible.
"I will uphold the rules of a trial and allow you all the chance to speak about him. You will answer two questions. ‘Will Shuuta Fenton be useful to me in his current state as it pertains to the defense of Cridia?’ ‘Does Shuuta Fenton deserve to be sacrificed so that I may summon another warrior?’ Use this inability to conquer his trauma as a basis for your answer," Meruria added. She summoned a little bell and explained that it made a noise when a lie was spoken. She proved it worked by saying that her name was Molly, and it rang. When she said Meruria, the bell remained silent.
One by one, the students who didn’t know of Shuuta’s existence prior to the events on the plane decided his future. A large majority believed he wouldn’t be useful at all, and those that shared this belief wanted him to be gone. They really spared no time going for the jugular and wished for someone stronger to take his place.
After all, the weak were devoured by the strong, and everyone attending Mekka Academy had the instinct of a vicious, bloodthirsty wolf. They fought, clawed, and trampled over those that were too feeble to have the drive they had.
When it was Damon’s turn, he spoke from the heart and didn’t allow what happened on the plane to influence his judgement.
“Just think of him like a toy, yeah? When you buy something and it turns out to be defective, you don’t try to fix it. You go and get your money back or exchange it for something that actually works. Oh, he’s awake?”
A feeling of being weightless overcame my body as the realization I was stuck in this hell shocked me into consciousness. I had awoken as Damon was comparing me to some sort of broken toy. I looked down at the bed I was raped on, then towards the shocked expressions of the seven that wanted me to remain alive. They found it hard to keep eye contact. The damp blanket wrapped around me restricted my movements. I could only really turn my head.
I don’t blame them... Why...can’t I die...?
Greggie called my name so many times, but I couldn’t formulate enough energy to reply.
To me, it seemed the trial was going on ahead of schedule... Or was it?
Did it matter?
A short girl with black curly hair named Renata was called to speak. She said she didn’t want to see anyone sacrificed while agreeing I wouldn’t be useful. Benedict, a bald student with thick arms that barely fit his gray t-shirt, was called after her, and his answers were the same.
Next was Shiku, who spoke plainly and hastily that I would not be helpful. On the topic of recycling, he mentioned that if there was a way that wouldn’t end in the loss of life, we should go that way because it would mean there would be at least one more body at the ready to protect Cridia.
“Let us take care of Shuuta. We don’t have to sacrifice him. I’ll work twice as hard—we'll all work to make up for—” Quella started to say.
“That is something I cannot allow,” Tokko replied. “Being responsible for someone that, in metaphorical terms, cannot even walk by himself is a tremendous drain on resources. Every decision you make would be delayed, and that could lead to catastrophic consequences because we had to consider someone that cannot fight. In addition, it isn’t fair to the others. We all worked hard—using our blood, sweat, and tears to accomplish our goals. Shuuta, you have not achieved anything of note.” He spoke of how Mia had spent nearly a hundred hours a week bettering her archery and performing research before she was even ten years old. “Everyone but Shuuta has spent countless hours carving out our destiny to attend Mekka Academy, which stands as proof of our determination. It is pathetic that you want to coast through this new world on our coattails.”
I just want to live my own life. Why is that so wrong?
“But that’s not true! He—"
“Look at him,” Tokko cut off Quella’s rebuttal. “Willpower cannot be forged to the degree we need in just three days. If it could, I would be instructing him because I knew I could lead him past his trauma and become a better man.”
Better man? Trauma?
Meruria asked two specific questions to Tokko and Mia, but their opinions on me were well known, so she moved on to Quella.
"Do you believe Shuuta deserves to be sacrificed?” asked Meruria.
“No.” Quella’s reply came swiftly.
“Then will he be useful?”
“Yes, he will. I guarantee it.”
Ring!
“What?! No, that’s not a lie!”
Ring!
“I know he can be useful!”
Ring!
“A lie...” I croaked; my voice extremely hoarse. “It’s all...a lie...?”
“Shuuta, you can be useful! I know you can!” Quella’s voice grew even more aggressive, yet that little bell continued to ring.
One by one, Ms. Mary, Elly, Greggie, Keeth, Ami, and Will answered Meruria’s question, and it seemed neither of them had any faith in me. Every time the bell rang, they called out my name, but the pain was inflicted too deeply for me to do anything. I didn’t even have the strength to close my eyes or stop them from wandering around. The one that raped me seemed to be smitten with Meruria because she was petting and scratching her behind the ears.
Mia grinned and started to talk to a distraught Quella. “Did you want to save him?”
“I did.”
“Why? Before the incident on the plane, you had the pleasure of not knowing his existence.”
“Because I don’t want to see him die.”
Ring!
The irritating cry of a bell had the same effect as a bombshell.
“Qutie…?” Elly whispered, her arms quivering against her bindings as unfathomable sadness darkened her expression. “You were the first—”
“That bell is broken! It’s true!”
Ring!
“I knew it,” Mia smugly smiled. “Nihil Nisi Perfectum… That is your family’s motto, correct? Nothing but perfection? All your life, you’ve been driven by a singular goal to avoid failure. I don’t know why you targeted him, but because you did, you were obligated to prevent his sacrifice. You must’ve automatically stepped because of how difficult it would be. That explains it all, yes? You don’t even care about him. You just want the thrill and satisfaction of not failing this Herculean task. If the stance was flipped, you’d be arguing for his death because that would be the goal.”
“THAT ISN’T TRUE!”
Ring!
“Shuuta, I did this because—”
Quella kept talking, but the words didn’t reach my ears. She struggled against the bindings around her legs, trying to hop forward but failing and smashing into the ground.
“It...was...all...a...lie...? You’re...just like them? I was always meant to...die?” I didn’t even have the strength to cry. What good would tears do?
"Hmm..." Meruria tapped her chin with a finger. "It seems the general consensus supports his sacrifice. I'm glad I summoned smart and capable warriors. As an added bonus, just see for yourself how weak and useless he would have been for us."
The tip of her staff flashed, then the blanket keeping me covered vanished, allowing everyone to see the litany of scars covering my body. I'd tried my best to keep them hidden, but my sunken chest and thin waist provided proof of my abusive upbringing.
"HOLY SHIT! Look at his crotch... It's like someone took a weedwhacker to his dick!" Damon exclaimed. Some of the other students had similar reactions to my wounds. Some groaned in disgust, and others gasped so loudly you could hear it over everyone. A short girl with curly hair and her friend found it hard to stare away, but I didn't think they took pleasure in my suffering.
"The scars... How horrible..." Elly covered her mouth, her eyes shinning with tears.
Ami whispered my name, the smile long gone from her face. She clutched her heart as if it was in pain. Ms. Mary was shedding a few tears and begged Meruria with Keeth and Quella. Greggie was nearly inconsolable. The big lad wore his feelings on his sleeves and cried the loudest of those that wanted me to survive.
Glancing over to Shiku, our glances briefly met for just a second before he shamefully averted his gaze to the ground. He subtly shook his head and clenched his fists.
I wasn't the only one to notice that.
"This poor, poor fool. What an utter failure of a human being. I thought Soul Warriors from across the wide plane of existence were supposed to be heroic figures of outright legend, yet all I received was a pitiful boy who was abused by everyone he met. If you had the power to stand up and fight for your right to survival, who knows just how powerful you would've been. Alas, that's not the case. Ah, has anyone changed their mind? Keep in mind that I desire the strong, not the weak. And any support for this miserable sacrifice... Well, I don't have to say it out loud."
Only one person raised their hand, and it belonged to someone I considered a friend.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t lie,” Will said, the bindings on his limbs disappearing. He freely walked over to join Tokko and Mia to get away from Quella and the others. “At this point, it's more about me caring about you. I mean, look at yourself. You’re fucked up, and that’s putting it mildly. You have nothing at all. Just remaining alive must be a living hell for you, and from the bottom of my heart, I think sacrificing you is the best option because you’ll be free from this pain. And I’m not making this decision lightly. It pains me, man. It really does. We were friends-- close friends. If you had told us earlier, we could've helped you. But now? I'm...sorry."
The bell remained silent.
“And I know I’m not the only one thinking like this.”
All at once, Quella and the others shouted that wasn’t true, and the bell chimed six times, indicating that their feelings had changed.
And that was that.
I...was going to die...
“Lord Meruria, how exactly does this ‘recycling’ work?” Tokko asked, yawning.
“I open a gate to that beyond the realm of existence. The winds of infinite void reign supreme there, eliminating all that dare to invade their domain. In exchange for his soul and flesh, they will return the Holy Mana I used to summon that pathetic weakling.”
“Then if it pleases you, could you summon it?”
Meruria nodded to her strongest warrior “The winds of infinite void... I call upon you!!!!” She raised both hands in the air as her golden staff disappeared. A moment later, it shimmered into existence from an explosion of blinding light. She slammed the butt of her staff into the ground. The fabric of reality cracked apart when she lifted it up, allowing a blanket of purple void to anchor itself to the spot where her weapon hit the floor. It twisted and morphed into a soul-wrenching vertical form about the same size as a set of double doors. Pure darkness was the outline, and from within it, I saw…death. A trillion winds cackled in my general direction.
Meruria lowered my body to the bed and called upon Damon and Shiku to ferry me over to the portal. I felt myself being lifted into the air, my whole naked body on display like a trophy as Meruria smiled at my forthcoming death.
The bell kept chiming and chiming as Quella and the others’ voices became garbled. I couldn’t pluck out what they were saying, but the bell was the perfect interpreter. Meruria must've gotten tired of its constant ringing because it disappeared in a flash of light.
“Your life is a stain we couldn’t erase,” Mia said. “Be thankful we can finally rectify that mistake.”
As I was drawn ever closer, it felt like something inside of me broke. Perhaps it was the bell’s constant chirping. Or maybe it was that prostitute that happily received head pats from Meruria.
Maybe it was everything.
Or maybe it was nothing.
Perhaps it was a final cry for help, but I found enough strength to cling onto one last bastion.
“Quella, don’t let them do this to me. Please, help me!!!! Elly!!!! AMI!!!! GREGGIE, I NEED YOU!!!! DON’T LET THEM KILL ME!!!!! KEETH?!?!?! HELP ME, KEETH!!!!!! WILL!!!!! I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!!!! I DON’T WANNA DIE!!!!!!!!”
“Wouldn’t you rather have your classmates’ last memory of you be heroic? Or would you rather them remember you as the powerless, useless, fearful coward you are now?” Meruria asked.
Something happened... I felt something crack from the depths of my core...and wondered if this was what ‘hate’ and ‘rage’ felt like? Did they finally decide to show up? Why now? Why here? Why couldn’t they have made themselves known earlier?!
As I’d thought before, it would be one thing if I left the world on my own terms, but I just couldn’t die like this...
I couldn’t leave this world like this...
I refused to.
I listened to this fury in my heart and spoke my truest desires.
“Listen to your shitty Holy Lord like good loyal dogs who can’t think for themselves! Make sure to bark while you’re at it, alright?!” I growled. “Count the days! This won’t be the end of me!!!! THIS WON’T BE THE END OF ME!!!! I WILL TEAR YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF!!!” For the first time in my life, I spoke with vengeance as the foundation of my words. Anger’s seething heat forcibly contorted my normally blank expression to one of disgust, allowing it to take on a never-before-seen form. When they carried me past that Beastfolk, I broke free for a second and grasped at her cotton robe. I pulled her in my direction because I wanted this bitch to die with me.
I just wasn’t strong enough to achieve that.
Damon grabbed my wrist and bent it in an unnatural direction, but the pain felt good. Shiku grabbed my arm and forced it behind my back. I was struggling and managed to look up at his face. There was blood running down his lips from where he was biting it.
“Hahaha!!! You’re going to die!!! I’m going to be every fucking shadow!!! You fucking rapist! You shitty Holy Lord, I’m going to scrape out your fucking brains!!!!" I screamed, my voice turning hoarse.
“You know, this edgy attitude isn’t doing anything. You think a small spark of fury will help? You’re still just pathetic, you know. Just go ahead and die,” Damon said a second before they let go of me. His overall demeanor had slightly changed from how he was on the plane.
Shiku remained speechless.
After feeling a sense of weightlessness, I was thrown through that portal even as I screamed a thousand threats and locked eyes with Damon and Shiku.
Was Mia scared? What about Tokko? That fucking traitor, Will? Greggie? Keeth? Quella? Elly? Ami? Ms. Mary? They never had any faith in me. And they thought it was better to put me out of my misery.
In the next few seconds, my skin was ripped off. Next came my muscles and bones, which drained from my body in a crimson and white-colored mist. I couldn’t see or focus on anything but the excruciating anguish, but it felt good.
After that?
The void had me trapped.
Noise ceased to exist. Light was just a memory. Taste was a forgotten concept. Smell? I couldn’t even remember what ‘smelling’ was. Touching the piercing black void around me did nothing because I wasn’t even sure I had hands. And I had soon forgotten what ‘touching’ even meant.
After the initial assault, there wasn’t even any pain. If I was a soul, then the everlasting abuse Meruria spoke of didn’t do much at all. I wouldn’t put it past her to lie to me about that, but maybe the torture was something else? I was still very much alive…
For the first few seconds, at least.
In mere seconds, absolute hell broke loose when it became impossible to keep my psyche together.
Time was a formless concept, so counting the seconds failed because I had forgotten what ‘time’ was.
Numbers were the next conceptualization to vanish from my mind. Anger? The one emotion I just discovered that slumbered within my abused breast. I clung to its heat for as long as I could, letting happiness, sadness, and fear pass me by. Disgust, anxiety, and shame were three things I easily sacrificed if it meant I could harness this fury within my formless existence for a little bit longer. Surprise? Embarrassment? Pride? When had I ever needed those fucking things? Pity? Sympathy? Fucking admiration?
No!
No!
I needed anger!
I desired anger!
No! Don’t take it from me!!! In my final moments before my assimilation with the void could be completed, it seemed my mind saw fit to give me a bout of hallucination.
Alert: Unknown entity detected within the void.
Alert: Barrier coherency is weakening.
Alert: Taking effective action. Entity, doest thou wish to survive?
What? Why could I see words in a void where everything was broken down to its simplest form? Wishing to live… Did my mind want to abandon me at my lowest point?
The final sparks of my red-hot fury flashed bright and true, giving me the final ounce of willpower to focus on four little words before the nothingness devoured me.
I...want...to...live...
I want to live.
Alert: Mental acknowledgement confirmed. Granting Divine Skill: [Wrath, Flames of Inexhaustible Indignation.]
New Divine Skill: [Wrath, Flames of Inexhaustible Indignation.]
Within this blackened void, a spark of crimson filled my soul. Its light regathered the emotions I sacrificed to keep my wrathful fury, bringing them back to me… I wasn’t completely whole, and it felt like it would take some time to put me back together since I was hanging on by something even less than a thread.
Alert: Doest thou wish for a second chance?
I do…
Alert: Will thou rescind thy humanity?
I will… I’ll throw it all away to kill that goddamn bitch… Warm fury flowed through me like blood. With every passing second, a thousand variations of Meruria’s death filled this void with a slice of my violently vivid imagination.
Alert: Granting skill: [Lesser Chimera.]
Alert: Attempt failed.
Alert: Sacrificing [Soul Armatization] and [Soul Warrior] to grant Divine Skill: [Chimeric Mastery.]
New Divine Skill: [Chimeric Mastery.]
Alert: Granting **** Skill: [Hermes Trismegistus]
New **** Skill: [Hermes Trismegistus]
Alert: Could not finalize [Hermes Trismegistus.] Alerting the Conduit for final initialization.
Alert: Granting Title: [Lesser Chimera.]
New Title: [Lesser Chimera]
Alert: Will thee endure the vast reaches of the infinite void? Will thy cling fast to life? Will thee remain firm in thine anger?
I will… This won’t be the end of me… IT WON’T BE THE END OF ME!!!
At some point, the words became something that was always there. You wouldn’t look twice at a rock you see on your everyday journey. Even the most observant wouldn’t notice a tiny change in size or shape here and there, especially in a place where the common rules of the world didn’t apply.
On top of that, this unyielding rage made it impossible to read what must’ve been a figment of my imagination.
I didn’t care how long it would take…but I would always channel this rage and imagine the horrifyingly violent deaths for those damn traitors…
Kill them…
They must die...
If they live, the mission is over...
If they survive, revenge is considered a failure...
I must make them bleed....
I need to see their deaths...
If I’m not the one that kills them...
Then what has all of this been for…?
DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!!!!!!!!!!
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
DON’TFORGET
Revenge...?
Yes, my revenge...
They have to die...
Focus... Focus on their deaths... Focus on the sweet, sweet relief you’d feel once they’ve passed into the afterlife...
Focus…
Count.
Focus.
Count.
Focus.
Don’t lose your way..
How…do I count? Numbers? Wan…won…one… 1…2… Yes, I remember now…
Count…
1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 8... 20... 34... 234... 567... 1,284... 2,342.... 384,723... 2,678,400…
Just…how long was a second? Or a minute? What determined an hour? Why was an hour an hour? Why… Explain…
As I debated about time and its rules of classification, a colorless speck surrounded a tiny spot in this nether-like void of space and nothingness. I felt compelled to will my anger towards this foreign entity since I had nothing better to do.
Entity? Why…is that familiar? Words? Alert? No, it doesn’t matter. Focus this anger and send it to the speck…
Alert: Assisting in the summoning initiated by the Dark Lord of Tyranny...
Alert: Summoning successful...
Alert: Seek out and restore the balance.
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