Reincarnated as a Phoenix

Chapter 218 – Return to the Fold

---FYI, if the images aren't showing, just right click the image and open it up in a new tab. Sounds obvious but you never know, not a single image is showing up for me right now.

__________

“Urghhh… everything aches… except my head”

“Heh, even when we’re unconscious, you still end up in my arms Ikarus. Still loving breasts I presume?”

“*Yawnnn*… you knew that when you married me wifey. Just… where the hell are we?”

Walking up on Petra’s ample bosom after destroying the finale pillar, things are a little confusing despite the fact by head and neck is in a world of comfort. Only thing better than this is feathers or se-, getting sidetracked. Right now, we’re on a sandy beach, overlooking the ocean as well as gigantic mountain range off in the distance. Those cliffs look surprisingly familiar but I’m not sure why…

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“So wait… have we won the fight then? Destroying the world of the Gods, does this mean our jobs are done?”

[<Please tell Aesa Ikarus really isn’t that stupid>]

And of course, I’m immediately scolded by the robotic wife even if I don’t truly believe what I just said. I was just trying to be optimistic but it’s obvious there’s still more that’ll happen. In a perfect world, we ride off on horseback into the sunset and cowboy music begins to play…

“Aesaaa, we’re home! Back in our world I mean… you have any idea where we are? We need to meet up asap!”

“Heh, tell her I say hi Ikarus”

“Shh wifey, I’m on the phone here…”

[<Turn around and Ikarus will understand. The location you two have arrived at isn’t that far away>]

Listening to her response despite my system sounding slightly stressed, I do as she says and… huh. That’s awfully familiar… I think I know where we are!

“Climb on me one second Petra and let’s get a better view of things!”

“Heh, okay Ikarus”

‘Finally getting to carry the wife again and back home. Life really can be great sometimes…’

__________

“This can’t be what Penelope’s area is looking like nowadays!”

“Heh, it is pretty cute, isn’t it Ikarus? Almost like the bird I’m riding upon”

“Yeah yeah, enough of your lovely compliments already! We’ve got some shit to do”

Looking down from above with the phoenix bod and performing my sworn duty carrying the wife, we can see the area Penelope renovated long ago and it’s turned into quite the sight. The beach we arrived on must be to the east of the mining island of Lesbos… why are we still going with that name? I bet it’s gotten even worse since we’ve been gone…

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---FYI, the spire doesn’t actually look like that. That building on the left is just a good template for its size.

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The beach must’ve been handcrafted because we’ve never had anything other than stony beaches around here. I would’ve preferred if the sand from the mermaid Pearl had been used for something more worthwhile, but what do you do with ships and ships worth of fine sand though? Guess we can have a party or a beach volleyball episode someday…

‘Yo Aesa… just how long have we been gone? Everything okay as well? You seem a little annoyed’

[<Aesa is fine Ikarus, just something is playing on Aesa’s mind. Regardless, welcome home…>]

I’ve learnt more than enough from my experiences so if she doesn’t want to talk about it, then fair enough. I’ll always be here to listen if there’s something the robotic wife wants… not like I have any say in it. I couldn’t mute her even if I wanted to.

[<…Wife and Ikarus have officially been gone for a total of 5 years, 22 days. If Ikarus would like the total amount of time since entering this world… 8 years, 338 days have passed>]

“Just over five years!? Eh, could be worse… and nearly nine years? That would put me in my thirties!?”

I will admit, there was a fear that in the time we’re gone, the entire settlement develops so far to a point where we end up in modern times or maybe everything is wiped out in an atomic war. Thankfully, everything still appears normal-ish, albeit new buildings are popping all over the place. It’s inevitable I’m going to have a midlife crisis now because I’d already be thirty… even if immortality kinda ruins that plan.

[<Before Ikarus finds a place to land, Aesa would like it if we sort out some system stuff first. If possible, could Ikarus potentially upgrade -doppelganger-? Aesa isn’t sure if it’ll be useful or not though>]

[Name: Ikarus   |   Species: Phoenix (Demon Lord)   |   Level: 1000]

[Health    166,666/166,666]

[Stamina 166,321/166,666]

[Magicka 166,666/166,666]

[You currently have 300001 unassigned points]

‘Oh right, we’ve still got some system shit to get through

Unlike the usual when it comes to upgrading stuff, I do have a rough idea on what I’d like and if Aesa’s making suggestion, that somewhat helps. I’ve got six things I can potentially upgrade and with not knowing when the next potential God I can kill comes by, it makes sense not to waste anything right now so I’m limiting the buys.

‘If possible, let’s upgrade my storage ability and… invisibility perhaps? We don’t use it much but maybe it being upgraded could work’

[<Aesa will upgrade 3 abilities then... all now confirmed. Ability -subspace mark 2- storage space has been quadrupled to now hold up to the weight of 4 phoenixes. Ability -undead fiend mark 2- now can be used while attacking for up to 15 minutes or infinitely, if attacks are not detected…>]

Okay, I know I was supposed to be taking this seriously but can you imagine the amount of cake, booze and gold I can now carry!?! Four phoenixes are comparable to four elephants or sixteen tons… of number nine coal! Heh… get it? No? I was a fan of all music so the old timey stuff works just as well. This will be hella useful though.

As for the other one since Aesa hasn’t mentioned otherwise, I presume the cooldown timer is the same but attacking while invisible definitely sounds worth the investment.

[<…Huh, that’s interesting. When Ikarus meets with Aesa next, we’ll see what -doppelganger mark 2- can do in person>]

‘Look at you doing an Asmodeus! Suspenseful much, I want to know now!’

[<…>}

She’ll happily tell me the other two but on this one, nooo. You just know it’s going to be underwhelming if there’s any build up whatsoever. Guess my robotic wife can be annoying as the other…

Anyways, getting back to the real wife because she’s now starting to kick… she’s not but I like making her out to be crazy, we need to make precautions before fully returning.

On my back coming out of my improved storage ring, appears two cloaks. Of course, it’s not like I can put one on just yet but she’ll hold both of them for now.

“Before we land Petra, put this on. We’re finally back after being up there, the last thing I want is the cultists fainting at the sight of us. Freaking idiots…”

__________

“Hey Petra… is it just me or are people speaking a little different?”

“Heh, what do you mean Ikarus? The translator sounds the exact same to me”

“That’s the thing though! It’s almost as if I can tell my translator isn’t being used yet I can understand everything everyone is saying. It just sounds a little… off”

After finding a secluded spot to land in the town back on our first island being the hot springs one, we pass by multiple groups of people speaking, which begin to confuse me the further we walk. Thankfully, they’re unaware the two queens have returned but this thing I just can’t get over. It’s really weird…

“Did you hear about the dude who kept trying to pawn his vehicle off to me? Such an asshole”

“I know right! That guy was a douchbag trying to ditch his carriage like that!”

“Why anyone would want to buy that piece of crap is beyond me. Belongs in the garbage, I say”

‘See? There it is again, everything sounds weird…’

Anyways, despite me now going crazy, the town looks as good as ever… not sure what else to say. Sure, things have slightly changed and there’s way more buildings than usual so it’s more like a city now, what do you actually want me to say though? We’ve somehow skipped generations and we’re now in the modern era? Five years ain’t that long!

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‘Eh, I guess there is more towers around now-… da fuck? We are walking here!’

As we continue to hide our faces under the cloaks, some idiot decides to ignore said rules of walking etiquette and charges right into us!

“Erk, are you fuckers asking to be bur-… is that… no freaking way! Why did it have to be on a day like this!? I’ve been somewhat normal for weeks, and the only day I humor the cow, you two show up!”

This black-haired woman awfully sounds a lot like Mr Obnoxious, also wears his trademark sailor uniform although this one is black somehow…

Even I’m not dense enough to figure out the connection, even though I’m lost how he was able to change the colour. It had to be the idiot we bump into first.

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Why, it’s everyone’s favourite tsundere punching bag! Before I even get the chance to ask him why he’s like this, probably down to the dryad, he can’t help but look smug and proud about what he’s been up to.

“So… what do you think I’ve done with the place orangey? You wanted me to teach people the ways of English, so I decided to teach them the supreme version of it”

‘Oh sweet Lord, have mercy on my soul. Words missing a U or an extra L, complete butchering of words like caramel and aluminium. Don’t even get me started on chips, at least he’s excluded the thousand advertisements you get with their version of… football’

Reincarnated as a Phoenix, now sponsored and brought to you by Raid: Shado-… that shit isn’t even funny.

Eh, I’m playing this up more than I actually care because I’m slightly proud of it. I did think something like this could happen but not this quickly, those books I brought from Earth can now be read if Zeki’s teachings have passed all across our lands. When Mr Obnoxious puts his mind to something, he actually is competent! No freaking way!

Give it a few more years and maybe development may skyrocket even higher but I’m not putting any bets on that. For right now though, focus on the black-haired beauty right in front of us… he actually looks a little like Petra at the right angle. Clearly I’ve got a type… shame that personality will always be disgusting.

“How the hell were you able to teach this many people to speak language in five years kid? And why the body? I thought the idea of it made you sick”

“Erk, I told them it’s the language their queens speak and those fucking idiots started worshipping it! As for why I look like this… I accidently let it slip to the cow. Long story short, the moron decided to go to the dwarven kingdom itself and drag the stupid thing back. In order to shut her up, I agreed to be like this one day a month”

‘Ah, Ria the dryad reasons. Makes complete sense since she’s set on making his life miserable’

“Heh, fair enough Zeki. You know what Ariza is up to?”

“And Minos while we’re still asking questions”

“Brother is back in the hospital like usual sis, and your little runt of a brother is somewhere in town with the water dragon orangey. There’s shit going on in the town square so that’s where the council idiots are at, if you wanted to know”

“*Sighhhh*… we’ve been back for minutes and something already appears to be going on. Guess it was inevitable… wanna take a rain check Petra?”

“Heh, no can do Ikarus. If it helps, I’ll give you a back rub on the way there if you’re still carrying”

Even though I’m seriously contemplating just leaving this place permanently someday, I guess we really should get a move on. No rest for the wicked and all that if something is happening.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way woman… you coming along kid?”

“Erk, you must think I’m stupid orangey. These last few years have been boring and shit enough, I’m not getting roped into doing more work for you…”

__________

“They can’t be rioting for us already, Zeki only revealed we’ve returned a minute ago!”

“Heh, think it’s unrelated Ikarus. Huh… these don’t look like our regular supporters though”

Right in the middle of our town square is something absolutely horrid to look at, a rioting crowd not exactly sure what they’re rioting on. I’m unsure what it could be because our protagonist politician is perfect for dealing with everything politics related… except excessive worshipping. That’s something that can’t be stopped unfortunately.

Right in the town centre alongside tw-, no, three statues, what presents both of us is hundreds of people, clearly angry, scared or confused, crowding up. The main thing that catches the eye is the clothing of most of the people… most of the are dress in the same styling of the people we came across, up in the heavens…

‘Ignore the golden statues Ikarus… you and the wife look nothing like that’

“Heh, it’s about time you two showed up. Look at all the supporters you’ve gathered”

Spotting Asmodeus on a small stage with several others, I almost want to throw a nuke at him for that sarcastic comment.

“Oi! Just what the hell are we going to do? The mortal lands, most of us haven’t been down here in a millennium”

“Yes! Is it true we’re actually mortal now? Like… we can actually die? That’s terrifying!”

“Defeating the God who rules all can’t be worth this sacrifice!”

Before we even have the chance to make our appearances, someone addresses the crowd from alongside Asmodeus which shocks me more than words can admit.

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“Aesa understands you are all concerned but if you don’t settle down, we can’t solve anything”

‘Damn Aesa, the hell you been up to?’

[<…>]

(Penelope) “Yes! Listen to Princess Aesa or we will get the guards to start the beatings! We need complete order, right now!”

(Marcus) “Erm… I’m unsure threatening a bunch of Gods, or ex-Gods is the way to go Penelope”

The crowd thankfully does settle down a bit from the few speaking, allowing us to wander through and get to the stage as well. Guess we can’t delay it any longer… just imagine us pulling down our hoods in slow motion and a big epic reveal with fireworks going off in the background.

Gasps of cultists that have ended up combining with the heavenly crowd do start to happen when we lower our hoods, but right now, we just need to get shit sorted. This stuff normally only happens when it’s the idiots deciding to worship the ground we walk upon… I really can’t get over those freaking gold statues! Me, Petra and Aesa… they do look pretty lifelike but I’m starting to cringe seeing myself like that.

(Marcus) “It’s the queens… welcome home you two. Have you any idea what’s going on?”

(Garry) “Aye lasses, a little bit of context will go a long way”

(Penelope) “It’s Petra and her lover Ikarus! Give me a hug… actually, screw that! I’m not getting punched again…”

…

Not even needing to say anything, both of us lovebirds stare towards Asmodeus as hopefully he’ll be able to explain a little more. Perhaps… the bloody reason why we’ve got all these Gods piled up in our town!? Most of these I don’t even know.

“Heh, it’s just the calm before the storm. I’ve been busy making sure the right people end up in the correct places, this just comes down to who holds a resentment for Zeus the most. All these people here… they’ll embrace our cause one way or another”

So… Asmodeus arranged for everyone to end up here? Whether his words or true or not, I can’t see how this many Gods are willing to support us after losing the ability to constantly revive. Sure, I’m not exactly sure if they can age or not yet, that’s really not worth even thinking about right now. I need something else to calm myself a little…

‘You know Aesa… did I hear something about you being princess a moment ago?’

[<Don’t even ask Ikarus. Since you and wife have been gone, certain sacrifices had to be made. It was this or cultists would end up 6 feet under from Aesa’s uncontrollable anger>]

‘Heh, thought you’d end up being worshipped by the time we returned. Guess I was right on that…’

Adding onto the stage, technically the bottom of the stage where we just walked up, I can’t help but spot two other people who have just appeared coming over here…

‘Is that… no freaking way those two are here! It’s cake lover-sama and the knight!’

Priestess once seeing us clearly has the urge to go in for a hug but has to fight it off as this current situation takes priority. Before we even have the chance to converse, someone wild screams out from the crowd even taking them two back when they get up here.

“Is that… what the actual fuck!? This is where you were brother!?!”

“Don’t do it old friend. If you’re wrong, you’ll end up punching yourself”

“I’m not freaking wrong Uriel! I can sense out my twin from an entire world away… it’s weird that he’s not blonde anymore”

The only person who tries to hold back Artemis is her friend Uriel, but it makes no difference as she’s already pushed through everyone to get onto the stage. Any more people and this platform may start to crack.

“I’m sorry… who are you again?”

‘Huh… does Nathan know who Artemis is then? That seemed like a lie’

“Don’t you dare play dumb with me brother! Just because I was born five minutes after you means shit, Apollo! I know that stupid aura anywhere, how are ya!?”

…

Immediately, silence up on the platform echoes all around as Artemis clearly has said something she shouldn’t have. Nathan can’t help but facepalm as well.

“Nat… what did she just say? You’re… Apollo?”

“It’s complicated Lotte. Give me a second and I’ll explain more”

Taking Lotte aside, this cleary is something that’s needs to be discussed privately… so they walk not even ten steps away. They are still in earshot so if I can’t help myself, blame them. Artemis can’t help but follow her twin brother as well providing a nuisance to all around… she really is like Zeki at times.

While Charlotte, Artemis and… Apollo? Or Nathan? Regardless, while they’re together, I notice something else happening in the crowd that starts to get louder by the second.

(Loki) “What the heck is wrong with you lot!?! All this time you were working with Asmodeus and not attacking blindly… why couldn’t you tell me!? We could’ve done it all together!”

‘Has Loki got a maid outfit fetish as well as a genital removal one as well?’

(Odin) “You really want to ask that brother? Take one look in the mirror and you may understand why you’re not reliable”

(Thor) “You really thought we spent all that time pointlessly attacking with no end goal in sight? Aye brother, just who do you take us for?”

(Freyja) “Where’s my love Artemis gone? I can’t spot her firm like chest anywhere!”

Surprisingly out of the Gods in the crowd, the lot I’m failing to see are the Underworld group and my parents, at least out of the lot who don’t hate us. I’d ask Asmodeus on this but this is chaos enough right now.

“I don’t mean to speak out of turn queens but, what are we going to do about this problem?”

Marcus can’t help but ask the million-dollar question. The fuck do I know?

“I guess this can work as… heavenly immigration? Or does it count as asylum seeking? Regardless, I think we may have to take these lot in now, at least until they get accustomed to this world”

I can’t get but frown at Asmodeus as I say that. He set us on this stupid course of dislodging all the Gods so now it’s on our shoulders to take them in. Defeating Zeus is one thing but I come from a commoner background, that means we must detest any form of immigration as they come over and steal all our jobs! Fuck the government and their insistence on bringing diversity into the world… it should be very obvious when I’m being sarcastic by this point.

(Petra) “What about the Gods who aren’t on our side?”

Petra tries her best to ask that quietly to Asmodeus but that grinning madman doesn’t seem to care about secrecy today. Everything is fucked!

“Heh, they’ll attack us dark one when they also get accustomed to this world. Give it a few days and they’ll launch a full-scale invasion… that funnily enough is why those two are here”

‘Well, that’s not freaking ominous at all!’

Pointing back to Nat x Lotte, this seems like a perfect segue, or an excuse to listen in on their conversation. With everything else going on right now, I need to eavesdrop.

‘Hmmm… I wonder what this looks like now… Status’

[Name: Nathan (Apollo)   |   Species: Human (Olympian)   |   Level: 500]

[Health    25,000/25,000]

[Stamina 23,685/25,000]

[Magicka 0/0]

[Name: Charlotte   |   Species: Succubus   |   Level: 500]

[Health    12,500/12,500]

[Stamina 17,921/20,000]

[Magicka 30,000/30,000]

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[Name: Artemis   |   Species: Olympian   |   Level: 750]

[Health    50,000/50,000]

[Stamina 69,190/80,000]

[Magicka 20,000/20,000]

‘And least that confirms it that Gods are actually mortal now. Artemis keeps getting in the way though… and Apollo has human like multipliers? I guess he still has his human body after all’

“…Lotte. This is the exact problem I was talking about”

“What’s the problem, my lordship?”

“This! Why are you changing the way you speak to me? It doesn’t matter if somehow Dionysus found some of my radiant energy, I’m still the same exact person I was yesterday”

“I can’t help it! If my original lord’s power came from you, then it’s only fair I pay you the same amount of respect. It’s just showing my gratitude really and worshiping those who deserve it”

“*Sigh*… seriously Lotte, calling Dionysus lord is fine but I can’t take it if this is how it’s going to be. We’ll have to stop hand holding if you can’t stop it”

“But that’s evil! My lor-, Nat… I mean. Hand holding is as good as… you know what I’m talking about”

‘Those two are so freaking cute together at times, both of them can’t help but blush!’

(Artemis) “Oi, you two idiots, look at me! I’m trying to reconcile with my twin brother here! I don’t care for your boring loving crap”

(Freyja) “Artemis my love, I’ve finally found you!”

“S-Shit!”

Even I can’t help but facepalm and quietly chuckle from the chaos unfolding. So long story short, Nathan is apparently the God Apollo and Artemis is his twin. I’ll ask Asmodeus more on this later because there’s still the need for boring professional stuff…

“Right everybody, shut up and listen! I’m not exactly sure why or what’s happening, but you’re all welcome to live here among us like mortals. Our rules are simple enough so just don’t steal or hurt people and things will be fine… you can leave the islands but I doubt most of you have any clue where to go”

After addressing the unsure crowd and mumbling that last bit, I’m honestly a little shocked some of these Gods aren’t more concerned on the fact they are now apparently mortal. Maybe it hasn’t full set it yet? Or that they just don’t believe it? Irrelevant of how that shit works, Asmodeus seems confident so best just deal with things as they come and go. It’s not like this hasn’t been crazy enough already.

Just as I feel like things are finally about to get under control, albeit and makeshift as we possibly can, someone else enters the fun and games. As much as I normally love Mute’s company, she couldn’t have picked a worser time.

<…!>

“Yeah yeah Mute, I’ll fly next time. I promise”

As she finds an empty place to land, mostly because the market clears to give her space, she immediately changes form and rushes to hug Petra. I’d love the cute sister reuniting moment if it wasn’t for who was up on her back riding her...

‘That freaking can’t be him… status’

[Name: Mute  |  Species: Dragon  |  Level: 381]

[Health    50,000/50,000]

[Stamina 29,237/32,750]

[Magicka 10,000/10,000]

[Name: Minos   |   Species: Dragon   |   Level: 147]

[Health    11,000/11,000]

[Stamina 12,691/14,750]

[Magicka 11,000/11,000]

My little brother… is no longer little! In human form, my younger bro basically looks like an edgy teenager. Although… he is rocking my twintail hairstyle, so I’m not exactly sure what to make of that. It’s supposed to be a compliment and not feel like my identity is being stolen, I think…

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“How the hell have you grown this much in five years bruv!? You’re like an adult already, even taller than me no less!”

“Greetings sister, it’s been quite a long time. You wouldn’t know where mom and dad are, right?”

‘He even sounds like he’s right on the cusp of puberty! I know our parents are built differently, but a dragon who’s not even nine shouldn’t grow up this quickly’

“Sorry bruv… yo Asmodeus? You any idea?”

I don’t know what it is but I can’t help but start going into common lingo around my brothers! Blame my idiot brother back on Earth, Connor, for my idiocy on this.

“Heh, wouldn’t worry on that too much sister. They are just spending some personal time with the Underworld couple first”

‘So, mother and father get to screw while we’re sorting out all thi-… just forget it Ikarus. We’re nearly sorted now…’

[<If possible when time allows it, Aesa would like it if we could get all the phoenixes together. Might be something that you might like to see Ikarus>]

And of course, no, we aren’t because Aesa wants something else done. The chances are, we’ll probably have to call a council meeting and figure out all this mundane shit out shortly. There’s no way things can go smoothly when this many Gods become one with us mortals…

‘Yeah yeah, put it on the list. You know… there’s something funny I’ve just realized. This could be the grand prophecy. Instead of the me destroying our world, it was always the world of the Gods. Let’s just hope it can’t be interpreted to mean this world is now doomed as well…’