Reincarnated as a Phoenix

Chapter 179 – Bride & Bride

---The longest chapter I've ever had the misfortune of writing! (Over 5000 words!) Seriously though, I see why authors rarely write about the wedding instead skipping most of it or leaving it to the end. Hopefully it's cute enough and you show it some love because this was torture...

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"Heh, to think I'm supposed to be the forgetful one out of us Ikarus. I'd let you use mine but I'm not sure it'll fit for you"

Now both just outside the church doors, Petra always tries to help my idiocy but can anything really help pure unfiltered Ikarus?

"Eh, I'll just figure it out on the go. Let's just head in quickly before I have another attack or something"

Opening the door, albeit as slowly as I possibly can, what presents us is obviously a packed hall filled to the brim full of cheery people all waiting and expecting us to arrive at any second... No Ikarus! You can deal with this; just imagine they're floating orbs of EXP or something else.

Once the door is fully open, the somewhat noisy atmosphere in the church goes completely silent, all focus is now on us two and it's terrifying. This is exactly the scene I was picturing in my head and my stomach feels like it's breeding butterflies right now, if that was the expression?

Petra sensing my nerves are starting to get the best of me again firmly clutches my hand and smiles deeply into the depths of my soul. All I wanted was for her to have a perfect day yet I've basically become a train wreck, I so don't deserve this woman.

As we're walking down the aisle together in full view of everyone, I can't help but stumble and nearly fall over when I see just who's one of the bridesmaids at the front. I think purple is the colour Ariza went for judging by the fact they all have purple dresses on, the people wearing said colour is Ariza, Mute, Ria and Zeki.

Obviously, we knew Ria has fucked him over here but little surprised they had a dress planned for him, guess Ariza plans for everything then. Guess it could've been nice for Aesa to be involved as well but she's happy chilling by the front door it seems. Everyone else is in something formal looking except Penelope and Charlotte, it makes sense why priestess would be looking like a nun but I guess mages refuse to wear anything other than their daily attire.

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---Here's the AI! This took long enough so wasn't going to do the entire cast lol.

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I'm really shocked they make them in that size. Heck, even mother is in something! Ariza really is the wedding planner Goddess it seems; she'll give Aphrodite a run for her money someday if she's that good at all this! Probably should avoided bringing that up considering what happened in the love dungeon thinking about it...

Anyways, should focus a little more on the special occasion rather than all this but at least it's good for the anxiety I suppose, there's definitely faces I can't remember around here though. Some are more obvious like the miners we first hired way back, even the guy with the prosthetic leg when but I'm not sure on others... Ah, I think that was one of the waitresses from the café we frequently visit? It doesn't matter all that much though.

Finally getting down the green mile, that comparison is horrible but I'm trying my best to remain sane here, all the bridesmaids and priestess greet us with smiles when we complete the journey. I feel a little odd considering we don't have a best man up here but the only real options are Zeki and Nathan I suppose. I like the knight and all but I'd feel a little weird calling him the best man though. Guess another option is father but if that wyvern hypocrite is better suited to the background now it seems.

(Ariza) "Uh, are you feeling a little better now Ikarus? We still can cancel if it's too much"

(Zeki) "Erk, orangey wanted to cancel!? What's this all about?"

(Ria) "Ariza just told you girly boy, she was feeling a little panicky"

(Mute) "...?"

(Charlotte) "Is everything okay Ikarus-sama?"

Before starting the actual ceremony, of course everyone's going to be worried if Ariza's just told them I had a panic attack. I'd have preferred her to keep it hidden but I guess she did have to rush off and get Petra I suppose.

"Yeah yeah, it's all fine now. Just in future Ariza, don't be making me eat salad for breakfast otherwise, this is the side effects of malnourishment"

At least that cracks a slight smile out of the really sensitive one of us phoenixes, I think she got a little shook up when things went like that so think she needs to calm down a little as well. If I'm making stupid jokes, it's obvious everything's cool.

"Anyways, let's all get started then..."

Priestess discontinues the whispering we were all doing and addresses the crowd as the officiant of our wedding. It's now time to start selling ourselves into slavery... I really need to stop with this now.

"...Family, friends and acquaintances, we gather here today to celebrate the union of Petra-sama and Ikarus-sama, and to witness their love join together as one..."

'Damn, Charlotte is a natural at this. Maybe we'll can use sama as our last names as well if we ever need to sign anything'

"...Before we continue further, you two both have vows prepared, correct?"

"Actually Charlotte, we're no-"

"No Petra, it's fine. Please say what you were going to"

I can't stop Petra from saying whatever it was she prepared, I'll have to figure something out myself but that can't be at the detriment of my lovebird.

"Heh, sure then Ikarus... I know you aren't a fan of clichés but one unfortunately applies here... The second I first laid eyes upon you, I felt something I've never felt before and love at first site doesn't even come close to explaining it. Your upbeat personality, your smile, your fluster, your silliness. Even when you pout at me for no good reason, there isn't a single thing about you I would change nor, could I ever stop loving you if I tried"

'Fuck's sake Ikarus, man up and don't you dare cry tears of joy. She always knows the best way to tug on my heartstrings'

Composing myself and getting ready to respond, I know anything I say isn't going to come close but I always knew I could never compete with her in the first place.

"Okay then... erm... eh, that might work... Petra, like the ying and yang, you bring light into my darkness and without you, I'd be completely unbalanced. Love is an easy word to throw around and of course, I love you with all my heart but I simply need you. Without you, I'd be incomplete and broken. You fix me and make me whole"

After finishing my makeshift vow, Petra can't help but lovingly smile and whisper towards me about it. Thought that was alright considering I've had about two minutes to prepare.

"Heh, you came up with that on-the-spot Ikarus? I'm a little surprised you even know of the concept"

"Well, I mean, it's a little cringe but it's Asian in nature so thought you might've heard of it? Only know of it because they explained it on an anime once..."

That gets a chuckle as well out of the gleaming Petra and can't say I blame her, any knowledge I have is probably obtained from experience, cartoons or erotica. Petra looks absolutely stunning today so you can see why I might be going there; never realize you could guess you can improve on perfection but Petra be doing that.

By this point, some of the crowd looks to be holding back tears of joy as well, mother is a key example but even priestess as well! I should've abandoned my pride and cried my eyes dry earlier if loads of others are doing the same.

"Lovely! Next, onto the declaration part... Petra-sama, do you promise to take Ikarus-sama as your wedded partner, to love each other in sickness and in health, and to continue loving each as long as you live?"

'Considering we're apparently immortal, Petra's going to be stuck with me for quite the while'

"Heh, I do"

"Excellent! Ikarus-sama, do you promise to do the same to Petra-sama, to love each other in sickness and in health, and to continue loving each as long as you live?"

"Of course I do"

"Then as a symbol of your affection, place these rings on both and repeat after me. With this ring, I vow to love you today, tomorrow, always and forever"

...

Both me and Petra repeat what Charlotte asks us to say once again and Zeki of all people gives us the rings but the entire time, I'm honestly a little out of it after seeing what Petra's managed to obtain. This actually makes me feel like a trophy wife now, going to whisper about it regardless.

"Seriously Petra!? I remember making a joke about this once but isn't this a little much?"

The rings she's somehow managed to convince Garry to make, they're covered in diamonds! It's got the same white gold design the engagement rings were made of but this jewellery is covered in the small gleaming bits of the compressed carbon. Yeah, I surprisingly know what diamonds are made from, doesn't make them any less pretty to look at though...

"Heh, my wife has expensive tastes so I've got to do this Ikarus, diamonds are even rarer in this world so just one of those rings is roughly around a years budget. Garry nearly had a heart attack when he heard about this"

"Wait, for the entire freaking settlement!?! Urgh... we need to sell these off and go for something less expensive"

"Heh, no my blushing wife Ikarus. The ring comes part of a package deal, it's me with that ring on your finger or nothing at all"

"Urgh... fineee"

'Look at her blackmailing me into being irresponsible! This is way too much... her calling me wife is making me pout as well'

Anyways, Charlotte waits for us to have our little moment, then continues on with the ceremony...

"Then, before I announce this couple as wife and wife in the name of the Gods, and my Lord. If anyone has any reason why this couple cannot be wed, speak up now!"

'Heh! Freaking Dionysus just cringed up and facepalmed when priestess said that. Feel his pain slightly with all the idiots that worship us'

...

Thankfully, the crowd is dead quiet and eager for our confirmation, knowing our luck I'm surprised someone didn't butt in there but as if I'm tempting fate today.

"Then, in the name of all the Gods and my Lord, I now announce you bride and bride! You may now seal this marriage with a kiss!"

Charlotte almost sounds a little giddy closing that up but my focus is only on one thing, that being Petra not wanting to wait a split second getting straight into confirming our marriage. This is a big problem right now, she's way too overzealous with this kiss...

"P-Petra... not the t-time for tongue"

"Heh, embarrassment or anxiety Ikarus?"

"Neither, l-little excited if you catch my meaning. Doesn't help considering how stunning you look as well"

"Heh, worked out perfectly then. You look gorgeous as well Ikarus"

The crowd erupts in cheers from us finally connecting our fates and the realization of us actually being married has finally settled in! Not in a bad way though, I'm feeling hyper like a dog with zoomies now! Screw that little episode I had earlier, we're actually married! Like for real, not just promising to do it but never getting around to... I've even got this stupid piece of jewellry on that could solves world hunger! Why the hell is it so satisfyingly to look at? I'd feel guilty about it but this one is all on Petra.

"So then, what's next for this little lovebird duo of ours Petra?"

"Heh, we've still got the reception party Ikarus. After that, an evening of whatever our minds can conjure up. Then, I get to spend the rest of our lives badgering my adorable wife"

"Urgh, will you stop it with the wife name calling already!? Honestly prefer chubby over that"

"Heh, nope my blushing and beautiful... WIFE..."

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"Jesus Christ! Okay, this is over the top even for our liking, we can't eat all that!"

"Heh, looks like your storage will come in handy here Ikarus. Think you've gone a little mad Ariza though"

"Uh, did you want it smaller? I told them to make it as big as possible but I didn't think they'd take it literally"

"My Lord, have I died and gone to heaven!?"

"No child, we're all seeing that monstrosity. That place you refer to is hugely subjective anyways"

Having just arrived at the reception party, the first thing we see upon entering the venue is a wedding cake the size of a carriage! I have a history of exaggerating but not this time. I'm pretty sure the cake lover Charlotte has stars in her eyes from this sight as well.

The venue looks kinda similar to that event I orchestrated back inside the last dungeon we went in, albeit a lot smaller and with a noticeable lack of blood or racists around. Well, except father but he can't be that much of a wyvern bigot if he gets touched all over by them. Getting distracted like usual, this place is mostly just an open hall with quite the few fancy decorated tables, a main rectangular one for us and obviously the carriage sized cake that stands as the main attraction. Ah, there's an ice sculpture of a dragon as well but I don't think mother or father even realize what it's supposed to be. The damn thing already looks to be melting, guess the mages must've made that since ice is a pain in the arse to get most of the year.

The church may have been filled with people I can't remember seeing or coming across before but this is a lot more familiar. I'm not going to list everyone off but it's basically anyone who spends a good time in the settlement, is family or is part of our party. Obviously excluding Geld and his master Asmodeus, this is a happy occasion so no thinking about all that crap!

As everyone is stumbling about finding a place to seat, I've also noticed another person fascinated by the cake. I know he has a sweet tooth and all but he looks like he's about to try swimming in that.

"Cu cu!"

"Sorry Minos but you'll have to wait. We've already gone off tradition enough so cutting it now might make Ariza sad inside"

"Cu..."

"You can speak me with me brother, I managed to deal with your cuteness ages ago"

"I know sister but I'm trying to picture if there's anything better in the world other than cake and gold coins... Cu! What about a cake made from gold coins!? I'm hungry now..."

'I seriously hope he never grows up'

Anyways, me and Petra eventually make our way to the head table awkwardly scooting by the people already seated on this long table, we're directly in the centre with all the bridesmaids and the boring couple alongside us. I really should stop saying boring couple but I love those just as much as everyone else... Well, except my wife but that should be obvious.

Once we're seated, two very similar looking waitresses flock over to us obviously a little excited at the chance of serving the two queens, the only difference being that one of them has that eye condition that makes the pupils a little different. Huh, it's pretty rare to see twins and one of them like that, no idea why I'm even paying attention to them especially with this monstrosity on my finger...

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"We'll be serving the two queens today so if you have any problems, let us know and we'll punch the chefs!"

"She's not kidding, any problems at all and those idiots will suffer misarably!"

'Talk about being a little hyper and a little scary, I'm getting Penelope like vibes from these two'

"Let's just start with some champagne please... ah, might as well leave us both a bottle or two each..."

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"Man, urgh... I'm stuffed like a pig now"

"Heh, my piggy Ikarus. Give me a little oink"

"Oi waifu, you've got literally zero chance of that EVER happening. I'm content with being part human, dragon and bird, but ain't no pig getting thrown in the mix"

"Heh, aww, you've made me depressed Ikarus"

After finishing both starters and the main course, I'm now stuffed without even starting on the cake yet. Who thought asking for a bucket sized portion for every course would be a good idea? Damn Ariza, it was the rabbit food causing me to overeat!

"Hey, erm... you can keep patting my head if you want Petra... only if you want too though"

Petra when making that stupid pig comment has awoken something in me... not in that way! I mean, she gave my hair a little rub and it felt really nice. Like, maybe it's all the glitter and crap my hair has in it but that feels like ecstasy.

"Heh, I'm happy again now"

Petra start rubbing my head again and seriously, I can see why dogs like this so much. If I start lifting up my back leg in an attempt to scratch my ears though, we're stopping this immediately.

Anyways, me and Petra had the same thing being soup for starters and a chicken bake thing for the mains, the filling aspect came from the fact the bucket size portion wasn't a joke. You eat three bowls of soup and you'll see what I mean, or drink because you don't eat a liquid. Again, blame Ariza if one of these buttons on my dress pops open.

Ah, we've had most of our family and friends come up to us already congratulating us, it's a little rude but I can't for the life of me remember what was said. Everyone knows I've got the attention span of a moth by this point... ah, someone different is coming over this time as well...

"Greeting to your majesties. Once the food has gone down and you two feel up for it, it's tradition for the wedded couple to have the first dance"

'Ah shit, I completely forgot about the dancing thing'

Who actually said that was one of the band players I also forgot to bring up earlier, mainly because they were running late and didn't show till everyone was sitting down eating. To be fair, the music they play isn't half bad but anything in the medieval era setting isn't going to be as memorable as modernish music.

"Ikarus, I know you don't like to dance but would you do it just for my sake? Heh, promise this will only be time I ever ask you to do this"

It's been a long time since I've seen those void-like eyes of her plead for something, as if I can really say no to her like this. If I just so happen to fall over making a fool of myself, then so be it, I'll blame the champagne.

"Fineee... just, you'll obviously need to take the lead"

Anyways, waiting for a little longer and once the food has gone down, the lights start to dim all around and what was a happy upbeat tune that was playing, turns into a smooth romantic kind of jazz. Okay, I didn't give as much credit to the band as the saxophone in this sounds similar to that careless whisper song or whatever it was called.

"Heh, care to take my hand Ikarus?"

'Sighhh, let's just get this over with'

"Yeahhh, okay then"

Without warning, Petra basically sweeps me off my feet wrapping me in her embrace as we slowly start to slow dance looked in each other's gazes. I'm not exactly sure you can call what we're doing dancing, we're really only holding each other in our arms slowly rocking side to side around the dancefloor but damn, if this isn't romantic, I don't know what is. My heart even feels like it's fluttering right now.

"You know Petra... you seriously look stun-"

Despite being in dance and trying to compliment her, Petra can't help herself but go in for the kiss. Thankfully, it's not as passionate as the one up the aisle but it's still damn good as ever.

"A-At least let me c-compliment you befor-"

And again, another kiss...

"Damn it w-woman, just l-let me say how pre-"

Third time! I just want to compliment my bride, am I asking for that much!?

"Heh, stop be so charming Ikarus and I'll stop. You definitely are the more beaut-"

Getting my revenge, I manage to catch her out mid compliment getting a kiss of my own in the process!

"A-Anyways... Petra, did y-you actually want to dance or was this just an excuse to continually kiss in front of everyone?"

"Heh, surprised you didn't clock on sooner Ikarus. I don't even like dancing..."

Just locked in arms with my wife and floating around the dimly lit dance floor, this moment could honestly last forever...

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Anyways, once the first official dance is over and others have joined in now surrounding us, I can't help but listen in around still while holding each other. With the amount of kissing we've been doing up here, it might be best to just try and calm it for a minute...

"Girly boy, you look really pretty today! You wanna plan our wedding so I can pick out your dress already?"

"I've told you before cow, that's not happening so you might as well shut it. Weddings suck, this one isn't terrible but we ain't ever doing something this normal"

Without even having to look at those two, I can already tell Ria's ignoring him.

"Aww, no comment about wearing a dress Zeki? Is this girly boy of mine ashamed that he secretly doesn't mind being like this? You'd look really sexy though!"

"Fuck off"

Thankfully, I know Ria's only messing with him because if Zeki secretly liked being female all along, all that teasing I've done towards him be wasted. Zeki must suffer, especially for what happened last night...

"Uh, I need to speak to you both about something. Something that happened last night..."

'Speak of the devil and Ariza joins the fold. Let's see how this turns out because she might be the most evil out of us at times...'

"...Ria, I've spoken to Loki and he can get you six potions if you need them"

"Really!?! You're seriously the best Ariza!"

"Erk!?! what the hell is wrong with you brother!? Why are you giving her potions all of a sudden?"

'Things are about to get good...'

"Zeki, Zeki, Zeki... I found out about your 'friend' who came to the guy's party last night. I tried to keep the location secret so you wouldn't do something like that, but you've been secretly looking through my stuff again, haven't you? Make sure he doesn't miss a dosage Ria otherwise, we'll have to force it down his throat"

"He-he-he, I won't Ariza! He's going to love it so much!"

"E-Erk!?! No n-no no... o-orangey was being serious..."

Absolute fear and misery can be heard from behind us even making Petra crack a chuckle, six months of punishment for Zeki!? Okay, this wedding might be the second-best thing to happen today! Don't be looking through Ariza's shit Zeki and karma won't fuck you over like this!

A little more dancing and what do you know it, another couple can't help but have an intimate conversation up here...

"Lotte, do you ever think about us getting married? This isn't a proposal but I am a little curious really"

"I'll be honest Nat... I'm not too sure and I really can't picture it happening"

Charlotte doesn't want to get married? Little surprised about that, I really shouldn't be listening in on a private conversation like this but still. They shouldn't be talking this close to my ears then.

"How comes Lotte?"

"Don't get me wrong Nat, it's beautiful and I'm really happy for Petra-sama and Ikarus-sama, it's just that just can't envisage it happening. Vampires and succubi's just don't do this sort of thing really, it feels unnatural to the fates of the world"

Even though she helped out Ariza massively and even was the officiant for our wedding, Charlotte doesn't have dreams of wearing white and walking down the aisle? I mean, even I did once but that was strangely enough part of the nightmare with the third legs chasing me as well...

"So, you don't feel like you deserve it, or you just don't want too then? If it's a latter, it helps to know just in case I was planning to do anything when we get back to the capital"

'Wait, was the knight actually going to propose!? I really need to stop listening but I can't help myself damn it!'

By this point, Petra's slowly trying to move and dance us away from those two but I just simply won't let her! We're not missing any potential relationship breakthrough, think of the non-existent readers!

"I'm not saying we can't get married Nat! It's just that the idea of a big party with friends showing up feels too open, I'd rather we do it in secret and not tell anyone if it's okay"

"Of course that's okay Lotte, it's just that I doubt we can keep it secret with wagging tongues and ears all about..."

As soon as Nathan says that, his neck turns to face me and Charlotte's quickly follows. Oh crap, caught fucking red handed here...

"Heh. For the record, I was trying to get Ikarus to stop listening but she wouldn't budge"

"Damn it Petra! We're a partnership now; you've got to take half the blame as well!"

"Heh, that may be your definition of marriage Ikarus but that's not mine"

Charlotte doesn't look too fussed about me listening in but Nathan looks a little grumpy, I'll apologize when it's needed but not for something like this! Find a private spot if you want a private conversation!

"You two must know by now all I want is for you to be happy. If that means I have to spy on any potential development to find out how things are moving along, it's happening and you'll just have to sue me for it"

...

'Yeah, it might have been better to just say nothing'

"*Sighhh*, heh, let's just go sit back down Ikarus"

Yay! The Petra's facepalming is back, don't even care that it's aimed towards me...

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"So then, who's next? How much more is there to go?"

As the night was coming to a close and honestly, my perception has been a little lacking considering my eyes have basically been fixed on Petra since sitting back down, we're just now opening gifts. Why my eyes are on her you ask? Well, it's getting late and it is our wedding night, it's kinda expected we do something really naughty tonight...

Cake's also been cut and only about ten percent of it has been consumed, it was nice and all but now the day has been long and all I want to do is relax. Well, relax isn't the correct word but I am tired in the sense of socializing with everyone. Just need to get through the gifts, thank everyone for coming and we can finally go home! I'd rather just open them later on at this point.

A lot of the stuff has been things like jewellery, trinkets, money and the odd gravy boat or something made from silver but there were a few odd gifts like matching bikinis from Ria and Penelope giving us our own pet rock to love and cherish. I swear this inside joke I wasn't part of is getting stale now.

"Uh, there was a messenger saying he had something Ikarus but I'm not sure where he was from"

'A messenger? Bet he's from the empire or the dwarven kingdom then, who else would send a messenger anyways?'

Both me and Petra indicate for Ariza to go fetch the guyand she quickly returns with him instantly dropping to his knees presenting a small looking scroll. It's obvious he's from the empire by the fancy attire he has on but what could Desmond and Esmerelda have gotten us?

"Before I converge with the queens, I must present this gift with Sir Nathan so he can share it with you"

'It needs to go through Nathan first?'

Giving Nathan a quick hand gesture to show it's okay since he's gone a little more formal now, the knight goes to collect said scroll and reads it to himself before presenting telling us what it is. My guess is that it's some fancy deed to property in the capital but who knows?

"Oh... okay then... this is, really unexpected. If his majesty really thinks I can soften the blow so to speak, then he might be a little mad"

"Sir Nathan!? You can't speak such ill will of the emperor!"

"Relax messenger, the emperor himself told me to be a little more forward and this definitely justifies as slight madness"

'Okay, the suspense is pissing me off now...'

"Nathan, just say the bloody thing already!"

"Heh, you look like you've just seen a ghost or something knight. Is it that bad?"

"It's not bad Petra, it's just... huge. Emperor Desmond has officially put you two next in line for the throne. I know his sense of humour can be a little difficult to understand but this doesn't seem funny at all, or am I missing the point?"

Wait... Nathan is deadly serious... that fucking bastard! We went through all this trouble putting in him his comfy throne with that fat arse of his, now he's throwing us the job when he finally decides to take the big sleep!?

"He can go fuck himself if he thinks this is happening, can't wait to send a rejection letter telling him to shove it right up there!"

The messenger almost despairs at me telling the emperor to go fuck himself, this is a perfectly reasonable response to being told... 'Hey! You want my empire when I die despite the fact you couldn't care less about those three islands you own? Here you go!'.

Petra doesn't show any visible anger from all this but even she doesn't seem to find this situation humorous in the slightest. I guess the option to just make Marcus do everything is there but he'll probably be long dead by then as well! Eh, maybe we'll just do what dragons do and go hide in a cave or something for the rest of time...

(Nathan) "Unfortunately Ikarus, he's written it into the succession law and has even started telling the general population about all this. He's also said he won't take no for an answer so I'm not sure just sending a rejection notice will be enough"

The bastard was always a clever fellow, even comparable to his brother if you take out all the ego and evil stuff. He's going to make this as hard for us to refuse as possible and frankly, I'm not going to spend tonight, our honeymoon or even the immediate future stressing about this. If he wants us to screw up his empire once he perishes, then that's what we'll do...

"*Sighhh*... Petra, what's the punishment in this world for kicking an emperor in the crotch..."