Reborn as the Princess' Knight (GL)

Chapter 19: One's Limit.

Kein's POV

It was already early in the morning as my body felt stiff realizing I've been sitting here, working for almost eight hours already. I couldn't sleep... apparently even though this is only the second day I've been working I might actually finish more early if this keeps up.

I put down my brush, went to the bathroom and opened the sink.

The water ran down slowly as I dipped my hands, scrubbing off the paint there as well on my wrist.

Surprisingly this mansion has a really advanced water system. I also think they use a [Water Stone] for their source of water. These are rare [Elemental Stones] found usually in the deepest waters of the Mermadia Kingdom where mermaids and mermen live.

I think I've read this in the book Lenard lent once.

"I do wonder where the stone is being held though surely if its a stone powerful enough to support the whole big mansion it must be one big stone."

I washed my face, the water tingled my skin as I looked into the mirror. A familiar reflection stared back at me. The same blonde hair, blue crystal eyes, and somehow white pale skin. There were faint bruises that were starting to heal already. It's barely noticeable.

I look at my neck, realizing that there are scars I never even noticed before. "I guess those will stay there forever huh."

I reach over it, rubbing my fingers through the permanent line softly sighing, "Kein Rosenguard, the real one. I hope you're okay now wherever you are. I'm sorry for occupying your body but I'm doing the best I can."

I doubt she's ever going to hear that because the real Kein is gone and I replaced her.

My heart felt heavy at the realization. I'm taking her place, her life, her connections, and her place in the family.

"I'm really sorry." I muttered in the bathroom, my voice echoing the apology.

Even if I'm slowly being comfortable because five months have gone by, I will never forget. I'm just another soul occupying someone else's body. I am not the real Kein but I will try my best to live the life she might have wanted for herself. "For now, to do that I have to get out of Kein's Aunt's house. That place has been hell for her according to her diary and it has also been hell for me."

I could remember the horrible punishments they gave. They made me stand up on a chair, pulled up my pants and hit me with a stick until I apologized with something not even worth the trouble! "Jeez, Lenard just wanted to help me carry the wood but someone reported that huh."

I took the towel that was hung on the wall and wiped my face over it. I placed it back and went out of the bathroom. "Oh right it's been two days and I've forgotten to write a letter to Lenard! Oh shit I hope he's not worried or panicking right now. I never told him I was staying at Vincent's place."

I feel bad.

Lenard likes Vincent a lot but I got invited over to his place first. Sorry Lenard! I'm the most horrible wingman ever!

I found paper near the desk, an ink and a quill as well. "Right, Dear Lenard. I apologize that I am writing to you. It has already been too late. It was a surprise to me as well, but Vincent told me that I should stay by his home in the next two weeks while I work on the portrait I promised him before. Please do not worry for I am safe and well. I will see you when I find the time back home to you. Sincerely, Kein."

I waited for the ink to dry as I folded the letter once before sliding it inside the envelope. "Now at least my letter of apology is done. I should get this letter over to the hot butler I met before."

I stretched my arms up as I yawned. The sun is already setting up and I'm here with no sleep. Well, you know what they say.

I might as well start the day rather than going back to sleep because I'll end up feeling more horrible later that's for sure.

"Well time to see what kind of clothes they have here- oh hell no."

I opened the closet briefly and none of these will definitely fit someone like me. The closet was full of DRESSES! AND HEELS WITH VARIOUS VARIATIONS OF COLORS.

I have nothing against them, actually they're pretty amazing but not like other girls. Not me and my feet will bleed in these heels! "But then again..."

I looked through the corner of my room where I took off my old shoes.

It was really worn out now. I couldn't buy new ones because I know that Madelyn, the maid who constantly has been a jerk to me since day one when I became Kein would notice the change.

I couldn't risk it. I'm lucky enough none of them noticed that I have a [Storage Ring] in my finger, good thing I kept it well hidden enough. "Since I'm not anywhere near the mansion I could buy some new shoes sometime here. My old one would definitely break down soon so might as well."

I closed the closet, refusing to wear any dress or heels. I don't care if in this country it's standard for women to dress all fancy but I'm from another world where women can wear pants and feel comfortable in whatever clothes they wear. "Meaning I won't give a damn and get into dinner with the Duchess and Duke in pants."

I went ahead and left my room still wearing my clothes from yesterday but I just need to find Nigel aka the hot butler and ask for some pants suitable for my size. I found him near the dinner table sorting out napkins.

I came up to him a little anxious because he looked really busy but I have to suck it up and ask or else I'll have to wear a dress and heels. I don't want that at all. I managed to gather my courage and tugged a piece of his vest, "Um hi?"

That got Butler Nigel's attention, looked down at me and flashed his ever so handsome smile that can kill. "Yes, young miss Kein?"

"This is a little embarrassing Nigel but do you have pants that's about my size and a blouse? The clothes that Duchess Viviana put here were really beautiful but I don't think they're comfortable for someone like me." I told him rubbing my neck, somehow the tone was a little pleading but Nigel nodded in understanding.

"I will have it prepared in a bit, young miss. Do not fret, please enjoy the morning. I'll be back to knock on your room with pants and a blouse that will cover the scar on your neck." (Nigel) bows as he leaves, leaving me alone in there as I decide to go back to my room and wait for him.

My hands wandered back at my neck, "Right... I forgot that scars are not really good for a lady. Especially for someone in nobility, Nigel must've misunderstood my intention but I guess this is a good excuse to not wear a dress."

I took the bathrobe, a towel covering myself with it and went inside the other side of the bathroom.

There was a small hot tub with steaming water in the corner.

Somehow similar to a hot spring- an onsen. It amazed me, apparently this is also powered by magic, fascinating.

I dipped my toes first in the water to test the temperature, it was definitely just at the right one fit for me. The water vibrated as I now slowly slipped myself in, my whole body relaxing at the sensation. "You know what a good product to use here? Shampoo. Thanks to all this painting business I never got to continue working on it but maybe sometime soon I'm sure I can finish it."

Soap, essential oils, and lotions exist here but shampoo is not yet huh.

Toothbrush and toothpaste is not yet invented as well, they only clean their mouth with water magic or something at least they're keeping track of their hygiene.

After a while in the bathtub, feeling my body rejuvenated by these steam waters, I decided to get out before I cooked myself completely. I grabbed a dry towel and wiped myself almost completely dry. "This is nice. I don't have to get up in line for the public bathroom in the staff rooms for a bath anymore, or get thrown around in the river just to peacefully get a bath."

Certainly, I wish to live here but at Vincent's expense this is too much. I can't bother him this way, I have to find my own place after this although... I'm only ten, meaning a child. I can't lease any property or rent a room in a compartment. "Geez I knew this was a problem for a while but this is getting on my nerves."

I wore a bathrobe, I honestly look adorable in this. Agh, why did the god forsake me with an adorable body if I'm dressed well.

​ A knock on the door got my attention. "Young miss Kein, your request for clothes has arrived."

That voice must be Nigel's. "Please come in, Nigel. Leave it right there."

Nigel opens the door but after seeing me he closed his eyes, "Young miss Kein. I'll leave the clothes near the bed side. I shall tend to my duties then." (Nigel)

Ah right, I'm only in my bathrobe, this must be awkward for a butler like himself. "I'm sorry for the trouble Nigel. Thank you for the clothes though!"

"You are very welcome, young miss Kein." (Nigel)

He closes the door after leaving the clothes on a nearby nesting table, mind you he did it while his eyes were closed. Honestly, he really seemed like a real gentleman after that. Now then, let's see what he brought here. He brought simple gray trousers and a blouse with an adorable little vest with blue linings at the corner. "This is my size too! It really feels so comfy! Damn, thanks Nigel."

I looked at the mirror and posed for a bit. "Ah but I need to wear my old worn out shoes. In any case I already feel fancy but the material used for these clothes were definitely fancy and expensive."

I felt so happy with the new clothes Nigel prepared for me, I came out of my room smiling happily as I walked down the halls of Vincent's home trying to find the kitchen. It's still early in the morning. I'm expecting half of the maid staff to be already awake preparing dinner.

Maybe I can help? Technically I am also a helper but- right I'm a guest.

I shouldn't make their life harder by volunteering...

"Lady Kein, I see that you're awake and in new attire. It suits you."

I could recognize that serious and grumpy voice anywhere. "Why good morning Lord Vincent! My clothes definitely look fancy don't they? It's the most fanciest clothes I've ever worn!"

"Please haven't I told you to drop the act of calling me Lord when we're completely alone?" He crosses his arms.

"Fine Vincent, but look! Don't I look ravishing? Dare I say handsome?" I did a quick pose for him, my hands on my waist and my chest puffed a little, the confidence in me rising as I really looked adorable in these clothes.

"I have heard from Nigel. These are actually my old clothes that wouldn't fit me anymore." (Lord Vincent)

My ears perked up at the information he suddenly dropped on me. "Wait? These were yours?! And you're not using them anymore?! Meaning can I have them?!"

Damn I have no shame.

Vincent smiles nodding, "I have more of these if you'd like. I best get rid of them."

"Hey, I'm happy to have second handed clothes like these. They're really comfortable and at the right size." I told him as we both started walking together side by side.

"I am guessing you did not like the clothes my mother had prepared for you." he says smiling really widely, I feel like Lord Vincent has already seen all of this coming from the start.

My face couldn't help but look a little sour, "Your mother is nice don't get me wrong for getting me those... awesome... dresses... and heels that I will never wear. I'm sorry but I'm not into those kinds of clothes. I'm more into pants, trousers, or a simple blouse like this."

He stares at me widely before resting his chin on his hand. "Indeed, now that I think about it. I have never seen you wear something like a form of dress attire or just... one suited for women." (Lord Vincent)

Oh Vincent... Of course I'm not. In my world, women are free to wear jeans, pants, and shorts. Some people can even dress up in drag, cosplay, and many more.

If Vincent was ever in my world I'm sure he will find a lot more people similar to him. I think he'll be content and confident with his style back on earth. I laugh a little at our situation right now. It's hilarious. "Kind of ironic isn't it. Vincent, you're a boy who's expected to wear pants, suits and stuff and I'm a girl who's supposed to wear fancy frilly dresses."

He listens in at my words. His expression looked hurt but he could only nod once again, "A shame isn't it? However, you did something I can never do Kein."

I tilt my head curiously. Something Vincent can never do? "What's that something, Lord Vincent?"

He stops walking for a moment before looking at me softly. "Expressing your true self to the world. You wore the clothes people would never expect a woman would wear, you were brave to rebel to their expectations. I... can never... do that. I'm really envious of you."

Oh man... I feel horrible.

I feel okay not caring in the world what people will say about my clothing because on earth I was taught to not give a fuck about it. As well as the traditions of women only wearing such things were slowly being forgotten. People in my world were free to wear anything they wanted.

I took that privilege for granted.

The fact that I'm a woman wearing men's clothes in this medieval world it's bound to be a scandal and a horrible one.

Imagine Vincent's condition. A son of a Duke. Wearing such feminine clothes. What would they say?

How shameful. Disgusting. Atrocious. What a shame? I could think of more adjectives they would describe us but I know it'll end up being an essay in the end and I don't want to take up my time remembering the words I've heard from others.

He also seemed close to his mother and father so I'm sure... like any good child.

He'll need to control himself and hide that part of him forever until he dies.

I sigh feeling guilty. How can I say the right thing to him? I don't want him to hide himself but what if I step over a line? "Listen Vincent. I'm sure there will be a day when you're free of those fears where you're no longer afraid of anyone else's opinions. Or perhaps a time where people will slowly won't care about what you will wear and even praise you for being brave in expressing your real self because... it's not easy."

"My only advice is this. Don't give up and make sure you don't give a fuck on what negative shit others will tell you. You're perfect the way you are and there's nothing wrong in wanting the clothes you feel comfortable in. Tell me if anyone says shit about it I'll punch them."

I make a fist punching the air motion as I look back a little. I hope these are the right words for him. Is it too cheesy? I don't know what I'm even saying- hold up- "Vincent are you crying?!"

Vincent looks perplexed as his hands reach his face. Tears formed in his eyes. "I-I... I apologize."

"Dude apologize for what? Expressing yourself? Cry if you need to jeez. There's no one else awake in the halls right now. It's safe." I told him as I gently held his shoulder, my hands going through the back of his head letting it bury in my shoulder.

I was a little short so he needed to bend a little before sobbing completely into my shoulder. Vincent sniffs as he stutters, "L-Lady Kein, to see me in such a state... I-I must look unsightly..." he muttered as he kept sobbing uncontrollably.

"There there. You might look unsightly but don't worry, for me it's beautiful and unsightly, because you're beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you what you want to do in your own life, okay?"

"Y-You don't know.... how much... I-I have wanted to hear that from someone... anyone... I felt so confused everyday in my life wondering if liking things like these... were some sort of blasphemy- a sin- I'm glad to know... there's someone out here feeling the same thing as me." (Lord Vincent)

"And we'll help you overcome your fear. Slowly, I'll be here for you. You're my friend now right?" I ask him while gently patting his head awkwardly because he was a little taller than me.

"I am grateful... for your friendship, for Lenard and- her high- I mean another person- for all of you to accept this part of me. It really means a lot." (Vincent) leans out of me as he dries his tears. "I have never broken down this horribly. I must be at my limit."

At his limit huh. Oh! "Hey, since I'll just end up throwing the dresses and heels in my room, why don't we exchange clothes huh? I want your old clothes that don't fit you any more and I can give you the dresses your mom bought for me. We can have a fashion show later at your room! or mine whichever one works."

He looks intrigued at the idea but suddenly shakes his head, "I-I don't know... what if-"

"Ah Ah! No buts. We're doing a fashion show later. Now! I need your mom and dad later to inspect the painting's progress. This is a nice day so let's have fun!"

Vincent smiles softly knowing I won't take no for an answer he sighs, "Alright but do you even know which room do I stay in?"

"Oh... no I don't and knowing me I'll probably get lost again just like the bathroom incident back at the royal palace." I scratch my head remembering the embarrassing memory, at least I met a sweet deaf girl who can write well! "In any case it looks like you'll have to sneak into my room instead of Vincent."

"The things I do for friendship." (Lord Vincent)

"Ye we're now legit awesome close friends my man."

"Your wordings are horrible." (Lord Vincent)

"I know but it makes me very unique."

Vincent and I continued walking feeling more relaxed and light after that talk with each other. "So, any plans for today's boss?"

"This will be the third time I'll tell you to please don't call me that." (Vincent) looked disappointed but hmm even though he tells me that I know he secretly enjoys it so I won't stop calling him boss ever. "And for my plans, I'm going to overlook the Spell Jousting competition that's about to commence today with my father."

Huh?

"Wait. What's this Spell Jousting competition you speak of?"