My Dungeon Life: Rise of the Slave Harem

“Dungeon Life…” I repeated, and then shrugged, sticking the game into my Nintendo. “Well, it doesn’t hurt to try it out.”

The screen finally came on, and I immediately had to shake my head. Seriously… no graphics! This might as well be an Atari game. It was a completely black screen with white text on it that said Dungeon Life followed by the words, ‘Start your New Life!’

I clicked the start button. Was this game more like Second Life? It might be one of those Java Mudd games that were popular a decade ago. I wasn’t above playing a text-based RPG, especially if the story was pretty good.

“Pick your class.” I read what was on the screen. “Your class is not your job. The class will dictate the type of skills you’ll gain to navigate the Dungeon Life. Choose wisely, as your play style will vary greatly based on your class.”

The classes were not what I expected at all. Rather than traditional RPG things like mage and warrior, they were far broader. The first class was Weapon Offense. The second was Shield Defense. The Third was Stealth. Then there was Long-Distance. Hand to Hand. Magical Attack. Magical Defense. My eyes went down the list until it fell on one that caught my eye.

Support. That was all that was written. Well, none of them had any descriptions of what they did. This appeared to be a game worse than I expected. It wasn’t very intuitive at all. However, I always played as a supporting character. I didn’t like my character to be the high hitter. Instead, I’d often play as a monster tamer or a necromancer and summon legions to fight for me. Then, I would sit back while they gave their lives, using little spells to help amplify and keep them going. I didn’t see anything like a necromancer, a druid, or a monster tamer… so Support seemed to be the closest I could come up with.

I selected the Support, and then another screen popped up. It asked me to choose a job.

“Ah, this is it.” I nodded in affirmation.

This list gave the more familiar things I was used to. There was a herbalist, a White Mage, a monster tamer, a support mage, and many more. On top of the screen was some text.

Your job can be whatever you want it to be. With the appropriate class, you can switch between the jobs at will. However, other than your starting job, all other jobs must be unlocked. You must discover how to unlock your jobs on your own.

I frowned at the somewhat confusing instructions. So… basically, I could have any job I wanted as long as I unlocked it? That seemed really overpowered to me. In the end, I decided to go for the White Mage. It wasn’t that I wasn’t tempted by the monster tamer, but I’d be able to pick that ability up later on. In the beginning, I found the thing that aggravated me most in games, and that was the inability to heal. Potions were usually really expensive, so a simple healing spell went a long way.

Of course, I wouldn’t have very much in the way of attack, it was probably fine. White Mages were usually given a pass in earlier gameplay. Once I switched to something like a monster tamer, in conjunction with White Mage skills, I figured I’d be pretty powerful. Thus, I selected the White Mage job. I had my doubt about the game’s quality, but I was a bit excited to try it. If it sucked, I’d just play something else anyway.

Are you sure you’d like to go to another world?

{Name: Deek

Class: Support

Job: White Mage Level: 1}

“Yes,” I said out loud as I clicked my tongue, “Let’s get on with this.”

{You have unlocked the White Mage skill: Weak Heal.}

“Wait… what?” Those words didn’t flash on the TV, but they flashed in the middle of my vision.

A moment later, I was surrounded by a white light as the world around me vanished.