Life in Vain: Jobless Reincarnation

180 – Wedding Reception – First

"...And so I hope that Rudy and Miss Eris have a long and blessed life together." Akito finished his speech with a red face and then sat back down.

I clapped my hands, giving him a bright smile.

Despite it being a last minute thing, Akito pulled through on the best man role and even pulled out a fancy and heartfelt speech.

And as if to validate how well it went, the surroundings filled with applause.

Akito looked taken a back, but then he smiled and nodded his head.

After seeing that he was good, I took a quick look around.

The ceremony itself was over now, so now it was time for the wedding reception. Basically, the part where people stood up, gave speeches and/or blessings, while the couple sat there and endured it until the end.

There were a few ways to set things up. One was to have the couple with the groom's family or vice-versa. Another was to have the happily married couple together by themselves.

Of course, Eri and I ended up with the latter option.

I wasn't sure whose idea it was, but I could tell that Eri was on the verge of fainting from the attention and embarrassment. While her face wasn't quite as red anymore, the way she was clinging onto me and trembling gave away her emotions.

It was cute. Extremely cute.

I really wanted to bully her a bit and see how she'd react. But that would be mean, and I *did* promise Norn.

Anyway.

Eri and I were seated at a table together in the middle of the courtyard. The guests were seated all around us at different tables, essentially trapping us in the middle.

It was something that Eri definitely didn't expect considering her reaction. That, or she was overwhelmed.

I was fine. But since my adorable wife wasn't, I held her close and stayed calm, acting like nothing was out of the ordinary. Par for the course.

...It was probably the only thing keeping Eri from running off in a burst of flames and ruining her wedding dress.

Again, while entertaining, not the ideal outcome. So I made sure to do my best to calm her down.

Since Akito finish his speech, and since he was scheduled to wrap things up, we were finally winding down.

Just a quick wait to see if there were any volunteers and then me and Eri were free.

Of course, I highly doubted there'd be any people at this point due to the social pressure-

"Alright." Dad stood up and then flashed me a grin. "Since no one's stepping up, it's my turn, right?"

Ah. Of COURSE. Dad would try to get in the last word.

Dad tidied his suit a bit and then grinned. "Since we've been here a while, I'll just wing it and keep this brief. I'm getting three more cracks at it anyway, so-"

Boos echoed from the crowd. The loudest from Mom, Mama Lily, Eri's parents, and my sisters.

Dad held up his hands and said, "I'm just saying it how it is. Tough crowd... but alright." He put on a serious face and then reached around to grab a glass of wine. After taking a swig, he said, "To be honest, today is a day that probably shouldn't have happened-"

Mom cleared her throat.

Dad coughed and said, "I mean, a beautiful day that almost didn't happen, ahaha..."

Eri rolled her eyes. Sneaking a glance at me, she whispered, "Is this why you didn't pick him as your best man?"

I gave a slight nod and said, "Exactly."

"Smart."

"Glad you agree, Eri."

Eri smiled, relaxing a bit after hearing Dad talk.

...Wait. Was that his plan?

I glanced over at Dad and saw him wink.

Hah. This guy...

How does he know how to read the room when he wants and fails to do it when it's important?

Dad held up his glass and looked around the courtyard. With a serious expression, he nodded and said, "The first thing I want to say is that I'm proud of my son." He turned to look at me and said, "When he was younger, I was worried, you know? Unlike most kids, Rudy was a bonafide genius. Even then, he was still just a kid. It was hard to balance that out... and I'm sure I did a terrible job at it. After all, I'm an idiot."

Laws raised his glass and said, "That is an absolute truth."

Philip raised a glass too and said, "Tell him, Laws."

Laughter filled the air as people laughed at my Dad.

But as for me...

I couldn't.

He was standing there, acting like a clown as usual. But that was just a way to keep things light. To make sure words were conveyed in a clear way instead of being stifled by heavy emotions.

Dad joined in with the laughter, but then returned to a serious expression. Still looking at me, he said, "I've been a terrible father. I've done my best, but there's that saying about hell and good intentions. Even so." He smiled and said, "I'm happy and grateful. My son grew into a fine young man, handsome enough to pull double the beautiful women his old man did-"

That time, Mama Lily cleared her throat. At the same time, something silver flashed in her sleeves.

Dad reached up to tug his collar and said, "Tough crowd... Anyway. I'm glad that you're happy, Rudy." He raised his glass towards me and Eris. "And you too, Eri. Although me and Philip didn't really expect it, you two match really well. Rudy mellowed out the firecracker of a princess I met when she was a kid, and Eri calmed out the strung-up genius who was always worried about everything."

Eri smiled at that and nodded. "Thank you, P-... Father-in-law."

I smiled as well and said, "Thanks, Dad."

Dad's smile widened and he said, "I'm happy. Seriously... But also, I really want to know. Was it the s-"

"OKAY!" Mom jumped out of her seat and said, "That's QUITE enough, Husband."

Mama Lily jumped up as well and then dashed over to grab Dad's arm. "Yes. I believe this is plenty for heartwarming speeches."

"H-Hey!" Dad tried to break free and said, "I wasn't done yet-"

Mom plucked the glass from Dad's free arm, drained it, and then tossed it aside.

I vanished the glass before it shattered. Couldn't spread bad luck this early into my married life, you know?

But nobody seemed to notice. Mostly because Mom and Mama Lily were dragging Dad out back.

Like before, laughter filled the air.

Even Eri laughed, finally calming down.

If there was anything Dad was good at, it was cutting stuff. And it seemed like he cut the tension here with his usual clownery...

I'd have to pour him a drink later and thank him properly.

He bashed himself a lot, but I'd disagree with him about being the worst father.

Hard agree on being the worst example of a father, but hard disagree on being the worst father.

Anyway, the crowd slowly started to settle down after Dad was dragged off.

Seeing that, I stood up and took a look around, smiling. "Well. Is there anyone else who would like to speak?"

Eri stood up as well. Looking around, she said, "The food's waiting for us, so if there's nobody else-"

"Wait."

Huh?

I glanced towards the speaker and saw a relatively handsome young man walk over.

Slicked back brown hair, light blue eyes, aristocratic and vaguely familiar features...

I didn't recognize him. But from Eri's reaction, she clearly did.

"That fucking idiot HAD to say something..." Eri muttered under her breath.

In the corner of my eye, I saw Norn suddenly get up and try to run over, hand on a sword that DEFINITELY wasn't there five minutes ago.

Thankfully, Stella jumped her and had her spirit friends dogpile Norn to hold her down.

Eri narrowed her eyes, glaring at the guy approaching us.

...I had to give the guy some credit. Even if it was the dumbest thing in the world to do, he was walking up here without shaking in his boots.

I'd have to deduct all of that credit back though because he was clearly oblivious to the incredible amount of killing intent being directed his way by Sylphy, Norn, Dad, Mom, Mama Lily, Philip, Laws...

You get the idea.

The young man stood a few paces away from me and Eri. After glancing between us, he looked at me and said, "My name is Luke Notus Greyrat. And while I do not object to anything, I do wish to ensure that Miss Eris is in the right hands."

...Is this guy for real?

I glanced over at Eri.

Eri was shaking. And not out of fear or embarrassment. It looked like she was barely holding herself back from smacking that guy into the ground.

...Huh. I was a little curious as to the history there. But I also felt like it wasn't something that we should bring up in public at our wedding where people could misunderstand.

Especially when I could see Princess Ariel in the back covering her face with both hands and Orsted shaking his head.

Oh wait. This guy was with THEM. That made sense.

Meaning he was an Asuran Noble.

A Greyrat too... And from Notus, probably a cousin of mine?

...Didn't Norn mention something about a perverted cousin or something in the past?

Ah, wait. I got it now.

Eri took a step forward and opened her mouth, clearly ready to give him a piece of her mind.

But before she could, I pulled her in for a kiss.

Eri froze, but then she got weak at the knees and leaned on me. "T-That's no good, Rudy." Her face turned red and she said, "E-Even if we're married now, in front of so many people..."

Okay, so can confirm Eri gets a hard reset with a kiss. Great to know for the future.

Also something to add to the Greyrat notebook...

A faint cold prickling sensation from the distance. Sylphy.

It was just a brief moment.

Even so, I caught it and glanced over.

Sylphy met my gaze and then looked away, embarrassed and... guilty?

...Alright. Another note to add to the ol' Greyrat heirloom.

But problem for later.

Right now...

I took a glance over at Luke to see his reaction.

He kept on a cool facade, but I could see the cracks there. Bits of jealousy and envy carefully hidden behind a knightly demeanor.

I patted Eri for a bit and sat her down. After that, I walked in front of Luke and smiled. "Thank you for coming, Cousin. I have to say, I appreciate your concern for my lovely wife. But she is more than capable of protecting herself."

Eri heard my words and then turned even redder.

Huh. Seemed like today was seriously short-circuiting her. It looked like I had a 100x effect to flirting skills today specifically focused on Eri because of it...

I'll make sure to put that to good use now and later.

But first...

Luke's eye twitched a bit when he saw Eri react. But then he stared at me and said, "Even so, I must insist on measuring the caliber of the man who-"

"Yeah, skip."

Luke's eyes widened. "P-Pardon? Skip? Skip wha-"

I snapped my fingers.

Luke's arms and legs instantly bent at weird angles. The sword he had kept hidden beneath his suit turned to ice and melted. And after that, he opened his mouth to scream.

But I snapped my fingers again and a paper sign slapped itself onto his face, sealing any sound coming from him.

On that sign were two lines.

1. Don't be an idiot like this guy.
2. Don't try to crash a wedding with stupid actions.

Luke's face distorted from behind the sign, clearly in pain.

But I just waved my hand and sent him flying towards the front gate before setting him there as a human meatball warning sign.

Silence. People staring with wide eyes.

"What?" I looked around and said, "He's not dead or permanently disfigured. That spell will wear off after the wedding's over, and he'll even be more flexible for it. He should be thanking me for the gift, really."

Soft murmurs echoed amidst our guests.

Among them, I could hear Roxy let out a soft sigh and say, "I pray for the poor souls who will think it's a good idea to object to my wedding later..."

Okay. Something to note... Maybe get some of the White Knights to hang around just in case.

But for now.

I clapped my hands and said, "In any case, it's been long enough! Let's dig in!"

-AAA-

Princess Ariel Anemoi Asura.

Due to her connections with both Orsted and with Lilia, she was invited to the wedding of Rudeus Notus Greyrat.

Since it was a formal occasion, she brought along her companions, Luke Notus Greyrat who served as her knight, and Tristina Purplehorse, who served as her guardian mage.

The invitation was a nice change of pace.

Ariel appreciated it.

After spending so much time in the vile backstabbing cesspool that was the Asura Kingdom, a wholesome and lovely wedding was just what she needed.

But then some IDIOT had to act up.

Ariel kneeled in front of Luke and shook her head. "Why did you have to open your mouth, Luke?"

Luke couldn’t respond. He was still silenced from magic, and his limbs were twisted together. It must have been agonizing… But he had antagonized a man who even Lord Orsted respected.

Tristina brushed her blonde twintails aside and said, "I told you that your brash mouth would get the princess in trouble one day, Greyrat. What were you thinking?"

Luke shook his head, as if desperately disagreeing.

Ariel simply sighed.

Truly, he was a man who thought only about swords and with his sword. Though he could put on a thin veneer of gentlemanliness, unfortunately when it came to adorable girl and busty women, he was an absolute disgrace.

At that time, Orsted walked over.

Ariel stood up and did a quick curtsy. "Greeting, Lord Orsted."

Orsted shook his head and said, "There is no need for that here, Ariel."

"Understood." Ariel raised her head and smiled. "...Thank you again for taking the time to come examine Luke."

Luke let out a visible sigh of relief.

Tristina clicked her tongue and said, "Can't we just leave him like this? Mister Rudy said the spell would wear off soon anyway, didn't he?"

Ariel nodded. "He did. And it is not that I distrust his words, but a secondary opinion is always essential to have as a future ruler."

Orsted nodded. "I agree. It is only through consulting with better and equals that you can perceive a path through the darkness." He paused and then chuckled. "That, and knowing when to stay silent." He stared at Luke and then shook his head. "Rudy is as impressive as always. Using healing magic to twist the body's nature and physique in such an uncanny way, and yet to do so without inflicting long-term harm... Incredible."

Ariel walked over and said, "Then... is it possible to undo it, Lord Orsted?"

Orsted grabbed the paper sign for a bit and read it. After that, he shook his head and stepped back. "While I can, Rudy did this to teach Luke a lesson. And Luke's reactions are understandable as Luke and Eris Greyrat have a strong fate... it is not meant to be in this world."

Ariel blinked.

...As always, Lord Orsted spoke of some incomprehensible events and concepts.

But as always, Ariel simply smiled and nodded.

Tristina smiled, staring at Luke. "So you're saying that we just have to leave this idiot here, Lord Orsted?"

Orsted nodded. "Correct. Luke will be fine. The spell is to conclude at midnight, and there are auxiliary magic circles to restore and enhance his body afterward. Although there is the downside of incredible pain, it would be far from driving a man mad." He chuckled and then said, "This is good fortune. Considering the internal disputes within House Notus, he should be thankful to receive a painful blessing instead of a permanent curse."

"I... see."

The fact that Lord Orsted was finding it amusing was odd. And the fact that he had chuckled twice was even odder.

When they were in the Asura Kingdom and wandering about the Central Continent, Lord Orsted remained inscrutable. Harsh, cold, and aloof.

Yet here...

Ariel glanced at Orsted and carefully said, "You appear to be in a good mood, Lord Orsted. Have you been enjoying the festivities?"

Orsted paused. "A good mood..." He stopped to think and then smiled, rubbing his face. "I suppose I am in a good mood. Today has been a day of many firsts." He chuckled and then glanced at Ariel and Tristina. "I am going to give my blessing to the new couple. Do not idle too long here."

After Orsted left, and after ensuring he was far out of earshot, Ariel shook her head and said, "Lord Orsted is as incomprehensible as ever."

Tristina nodded. "He is... But at the least, he is properly acting as your sponsor." She smiled and said, "Since then, you haven't had to worry about assassins, have you, Princess?"

"True." Ariel walked around to sit on Luke.

His face distorted and his eyes started rolling up in his head.

Ariel gave his back a light pat and then said, "You make quite the comfortable piece of furniture, Luke. Perhaps I should have you do this more often."

Tristina gave Ariel a blank stare.

Ariel noticed, but then responded to Tristina's first words as if nothing happened. "That's true, Tristina. But it is still a bit troublesome." She sighed and said, "Brother and that prime minister are intent on sending me away to study here at the Ranoa Magic Academy." She furrowed her brows and said, "They claim it is to 'widen my perspective' prior to the heir selection." She scoffed and said, "Of course, it's simply an excuse to send me away from Lord Orsted. Not that it will change anything." She giggled and then idly swung her legs back and forth. "They believe that Lord Orsted moves to my whims when it is the other way around."

Although Lord Orsted had done nothing but aid her, Ariel was well aware she was being used.

She didn't mind it. In the first place, she couldn't resist against the unstoppable force that was Lord Orsted.

But in the second place, and the most important reason, Lord Orsted had her best interests at heart.

True, he was clearly maneuvering Ariel in a way to claim the throne and gain power. But it wasn't for his sake.

After all, a man such as he could simply proclaim himself king.

Instead, he seemed to be doing it with the intent of securing something far into the future. As if her claiming the throne was a prerequisite to some objective.

And not for the power that came with Ariel claiming the throne, but instead a 'result' that would come about from her claiming the throne.

It was a subtle nuance that was harder to detect on a man like Lord Orsted.

But Ariel was more than familiar with the inner machinations of men's minds. Particularly those seeking power or influence of the throne.

And Lord Orsted was not that type of person. Instead, he was a man with a greater mission at hand, though unspoken.

That, and he was kind towards children, as evident by his interactions with her as she grew up.

So, even if she was being used as a pawn to become a queen, if it was a gambit in a game that Lord Orsted was playing, she didn't mind.

...Though she DID wish that he would smile more often. Such a handsome face was wasted being so harsh...

Tristina walked over and then hopped on the other side of Luke.

That time, his eyes completely rolled up in his head.

Tristina didn't notice. Instead, she smiled and said, "You're right, Princess. Luke IS comfortable as a chair."

"Isn't he?" Ariel smiled and then bounced up and down a bit. "I don't know if it's because of the spell, or if he's always like this, but it's really comfortable."

Tristina let out a content sigh. But then she saw Luke's face and grimaced. "If only he wouldn't have such a disgusting expression... Especially when leering at women."

Ariel sighed and placed a hand on her cheek. "Indeed. That's his one flaw..." She paused and said, "I wonder if I should agree with Lord Orsted and simply do away with the upper nobility. We're quite overdue for a purge... and I still haven't forgiven that minister."

Tristina reached out to grab Ariel's hand and said, "You don't have to do that, Princess. You shouldn't dirty your hands over something like this..."

Ariel sighed. "I know." She smiled and said, "It's best for a princess and future queen to be pure and pristine for the people... But there are days."

A trip through the inner sanctum of the Asura Palace was enough to make her retch. And when she thought about the children younger than her that were sometimes brought there only to disappear without a trace...

But you couldn't clean a home by burning it to the ground.

As much as Ariel wondered if she should simply request Orsted to raze it all down and rebuild from the ashes, she also knew that would cause quite a bit of chaos for her loyal subjects.

Really, the problem was only with the rotten top. And considering how few they were, picking off a few abscesses and tumors shouldn't be too difficult.

They just had to make precision cuts at the proper time.

And with the right people.

Speaking of people...

Ariel gazed back towards the courtyard, watching Rudy thank the guests with his wife.

Tristina followed Ariel's gaze and frowned. "...Don't tell me you were enraptured by that man. Even if you're a princess, taking a married man is a bit-"

"Don't be ridiculous, Tina." Ariel smiled and said, "I know my boundaries. And while it would be nice to be related to Nanny Lilia, I have a feeling that the kingdom of Asura- No, the entire Central Continent would be covered in corpses if I made a move."

She paused and remembered a certain young elf girl with light green hair she met long ago. "...Mister Rudy has some pretty scary lovers, you know?"

As if to prove Ariel's point, Sylphy walked into their line of sight. She paused and then turned to look directly at Ariel and Tristina before smiling.

Tristina flinched. "I-Is an elf's hearing that good?"