I Became a Witch in a World Full of Urban Legends

Chapter 265: Why The Hell Did It Explode?!

Whoosh! Whip!

The hard, bone whip that resembled the spine of a reptile swung relentlessly towards the rolling Witch, sending out waves of pressurized air. The whip itself didn’t touch the walls of the corridor, but each swing of the whip left indents of different depths on the walls.

Although Lu Yibei could predict the foggy man’s movements, he was simply too fast for her to catch up.

Moreover, within the cramped corridor, unless she wishes to take a gamble and perform risky tricks such as catching the whip with her bare hands, she could only take on a passive stance and dodge with difficulty.

She didn’t want to fling out any spell with no care in the world either. The bone whip struck at her, one lash after another like thunder strikes. Whichever wall had the misfortune of receiving its hit was heavily damaged until fine powder could be seen lingering in the air. She absolutely had no time to use her copper coin to predict the amplification of her next spell.

With no certainty involved, who knows what unexpected situations might occur.

If she unleashes an attack that is accidentally amplified by 50 times, her counterattack might just turn into a kamikaze attack.

She couldn’t even find the opportunity to zip open her guitar bag to throw whatever it is to fight back. If she hesitated even for a second, the burning pains of a whip would be present on her fair skin.

Plus, she did, in fact, try it. Every time she dodged to the side in an attempt to open her guitar bag, the foggy man who lash out his bone whip and hit her on the back of her hand with deadly precision.

On the other hand, the foggy man seemed much stronger in combat than she was – he was able to operate with flexibility in the narrow corridor; with strange scales manifesting themselves on his forehead, in addition to the golden, petrifying slits he had for eyes…

Each time he struck out his whip, it was like a poisonous snake lashing out. If anything, he resembles a mysterious reptile that wanders in a deep, dark labyrinth, guarding its treasure.

…

Damn it! How unlucky! Would it kill to give me just one lucky moment?

Dodging another slash of the whip, she cursed angrily in her heart.

Earlier, when she learnt that the ancient sword might be hidden in Lee Shunnian’s private quarters, she had already guessed that there might be somebody out to stop her.

Wouldn’t it be reasonable for a super top-secret room used to store powerful psychic items to be guarded by several psychics or urban legends? She guessed as much.

However, strangely enough, the closer she got to the quarters, she couldn’t feel any psychic fluctuations around her. Hence, she decided to take the gamble.

It’s better than not trying! How would I know what would happen unless I try?

Have you ever heard of anybody who is cursed with an eternity of bad luck? It is like a permanent debuff applied onto someone – no matter how small the probability is of something bad happening, inevitably, it will happen.

Lu Yibei is one of these unlucky souls.

“Hah!”

Exhaling, she leapt up and activated her imitation Divine Horse Armor, galloped up the wall beside her and dodged the incoming bone whip. Hurriedly, she distanced herself from her assailant.

Damn it – I can’t just dodge anymore. I have to do something, anything! Otherwise, once that woman comes back from dealing with the police, I might get myself into big trouble!

I got it! Should I try negotiating with him?

Maybe I could fool him into thinking I’m somebody powerful, like I did with them earlier! Maybe I can buy myself some time…!

Cursing, she steadied her body, and looked straight at the foggy man as she shouted with determination, “Enough! Cease this madness! If you stop now, I might just consider forgiving you for offending-!”

Before she could finish her sentence, the bone whip shot out towards her, this time, imbued with a mysterious black mist.

She was shocked seeing this, and shut her mouth to dodge to the side again.

Fuck you! At least let me finish my sentence, you dirty, cheating bastard!

All yappers like me should boycott this behaviour!

“Listen to me, comrade! I’m innocent, I swear! I felt that there were some abnormal psychic fluctuations here, so I came to investigate myself. I didn’t expect to bump into you! If you continue to waste your time here, the real thief might escape!”

“Come on!” she continued. “Take a good look at me! Do you think a pretty girl like me would lie to you?”

“Huh,” the foggy man broke his silence, snorting as he spoke in a deep voice, “ผู้หญิงสวยส่วนใหญ่ใช่แล้วคนหลอกล วง.*”

*(All beautiful women do is lie.)

“…?”

She was confused as she heard the foggy man speaking in a language and accent that resembles what the characters in a Thai soap opera that Jumeng watches would say.

What the hell? Why is there a Thai person here?!

In other words, he has no intention of talking to me! Fuck! Big L in the language department!

She was suddenly acutely aware that apart from the difference in yin and yang, the biggest difference between her and her assailant is the language barrier.

We should promote more Mandarin speaking classes to the world!

Fortunately, with the foggy man responding, she was able to buy herself some time to distance herself from the man. Immediately, she unzipped her guitar bag, reached in and grabbed at the handle of her large cleaver. With premonitions of the man’s next actions floating in her mind, her eyes flashed in a gloomy manner.

You forced my hand. If I could help it, I wouldn’t want to use violence!

Before the man could phase to her location, she whipped out her cleaver and slashed at the bone whip.

In an instant, sparks burst out within the corridor, alongside the harsh, deafening sound of metal and bone colliding.

Then…?

And then, nothing happens.

Below summarizes the three things that happened within that one second:

1) Lu Yibei, drawing out her kitchen knife, slashed at the foggy man’s bone whip.

2) Lu Yibei’s wrist became numb from the sudden shock stemming from the impact, and the grip on her knife loosened.

3) Lu Yibei’s ancestral kitchen knife is gone once again.

As soon as the two collided, the cleaver flung outwards, grazing the foggy man’s neck as it left a moderately deep gash over his collarbone. Then, with a firm sound, it disappeared into the metal wall, as it did with Yibei’s carving knife.

…what the fuck?! Are the laws of physics here different from the real world? Why is my bad luck never-ending?!

Meanwhile, the foggy man looked down at his bone whip that was sliced in half by the cleaver, then looked at the other half of the whip that was less than half-a-meter long. Gradually, his expression visibly darkened.

“Ah, shit,” the Witch retracted her hand. “Listen, I can explain – let me think of ways to make it up to you…”

With her hesitant tone, her eyes suddenly grew cold. Glancing at the foggy man, she growled a low, “Fuck you!” and pulled out the final ancestral kitchen knife from her set of three.

A sudden silver light flashed across his eyes, startling him. Slamming his feet on the ground, he hurriedly stepped back several meters, distancing himself from the Witch as he stared at mulberry cleaver in her hand with vigilance.

An ordinary kitchen knife will never slice the bone whip made from a Naga’s spine. She must have done something. – not the knife, but her.

Seeing that he was vigilant of her knife, she sighed and straightened herself as she huffed, “Boy, I told you that I don’t mean any trouble. If you continue trying to attack me, don’t blame me for what comes next.”

“Because!” she announced. “Once I take action, I’ll leave no room for mercy. I’ll slice this place down with ten thousand knives and a thousand cleavers, and I’ll make sure nothing is left behind. Leave me! I do not wish to have blood on my name!”

Ten thousand knives and a thousand cleavers? Does her guitar bag contain all of that?

He stared at the Witch, motionless.

Good, he seems scared, she huffed inwardly. This is my chance to get the fuck out of here!

Calmly, she put her knife back into the guitar bag, and glanced at the man coldly.

“Hmph, it seems that you do not know who I am. Is everybody under this roof the same? I do not wish to stay in such a wretched place!”

Rolling her eyes, she zipped up her guitar bag at lightning speed and was prepared to run away.

At this moment, a strange voice sounded behind her, like a Thai soap opera actor was reciting his lines.

“อย่าให้น้ำกระเพื่อม, ฉันต้องการที่จะเห็นมั นชัดเจน…*”

*(Don’t let the water ripple – I’d like to see it infinitely clearly…)

Chanting, the bone whip seemed to come to life again as its sharp protrusions pierced through his palm. Bright red blood gushed out of his palm, staining the whip with red.

Immediately, Yibei could feel the surrounding air becoming moist, as if the villa had turned into some strangely sticky entity. Large areas of mud and moss manifested itself on the ground, and bursts of a deep purple smoke emerged from the ground, spreading itself from the floor to the walls.

A slight inhale will make you dizzy.

The once hard ground beneath her gradually softened, and the foggy man’s spell was practically turning this narrow corridor into a swamp.

He didn’t have the courage to fight the Witch, but he couldn’t let her slip away, so he decided to use a spell to hold her back and wait for backup.

She attempted to take a step back, but felt as if each step was taking a step in a muddy swamp, and she couldn’t help but frown.

Are you kidding me? What do you take me for? Do you really think that I, Lu Yibei, would be stupid enough to let you finish casting your spell?!

Tilting her head, she wordlessly took out a crystal bottle from her guitar bag, stretched out her hand to form a thumbs up, and aimed upwards. Then, with her target on the man’s forehead, she flung the crystal bottle out towards him.

Time to interrupt your spell!

“Boom!”

A deafening explosion shook the foundations of the villa, and flames engulfed the foggy man and the Witch.

It was at this moment where she suddenly remembered that Disaster Liquid is both flammable and explosive.

However…

Why did it explode all of a sudden? This is weird!

…

Unit No. 16 of Hongshan Villas, by the open space of the swimming pool.

The police interviewed each attendee of the party one-by-one as they took brief notes. Then, they sent two men to search the villa. Seeing that they found nothing, they were ready to leave.

As one of the organizers of the party, Bai Kai kept slinging himself around a policeman to explain the situation to him.

“Come on, comrade, we’re just here to have a little fun! Absolutely nothing illegal has happened here! It’s just a misunderstanding, like I said earlier. I’m telling you – it must be some naughty little kid making a false report!”

The policeman glanced at Bai Kai and disciplined, “If that’s the case, good – but a party in the middle of the night?! Look at the time! No wonder your neighbours are angry! We have received many such reports before this!”

“Yes, I understand, yup!” Bai Kai responded. “I swear! We’ll take it easy in the future! We’ll close up shop before ten o’ clock! Comrade, I’m telling you-”

“Yes, I get it,” the policeman nodded. “We’re leaving now. Mind following us back to the station to make a simple record?”

“Absolutely. No problem. I’m an upstanding, law-abiding citizen. I will absolutely do so.”

The policeman was about to say something more, but looking past Bai Kai, he could see that the swimming pool behind him looked as if it was boiling, with uncountable bubbles rising up. Frowning, he stepped past Bai Kai to take a closer look.

At this moment, Bai Kai could sense strong psychic energy erupting from underground. His eyes immediately landed upon the swimming pool, and seeing that the policeman was approaching it, his expression morphed into shock.

“Stop! Get down!”

Boom!

Thunder grumbled from below, and in the next moment, the swimming pool was like a geyser, sending its waters up into the sky, splashing its surroundings indiscriminately.

Getting up from the ground, still slightly dizzy from getting drenched in hot water, he looked down and saw that there was no water left in the swimming pool, save for a dark pothole that emerged, with thick smoke coming out of it. Looking behind him, all that was left of Bai Kai was a dotted outline.

“…? What happened to being a law-abiding citizen?”

…

When Jiangli found Lu Yibei in the basement that was flooded with smoke, she was in a state of unconsciousness, holding a strange, broken sword in her hand.

Son of a bitch! I don’t keep my eye on you for one second, and you want to put yourself up on the 8AM news?!

Staring at the Witch’s unconscious body, she hauled the Witch’s body, alongside her sword and guitar bag on her shoulders, and vanished in a silver flash.

…? Damn it, why is it so heavy? Was she always carrying something this heavy around?

Not long after they vanished, bursts of angry curses from Lee Tang Han could be heard down the corridor.

“Who?! Who the fuck was it?! My world was turned upside down, and you dare to cause trouble inside my house?! If I catch you, you’re dead!”

…

Glancing backwards, where she could hear bursts of angry curses coming from the villa, Jiangli shrugged, then quickened her pace as she left Lee Tang Han’s villa.

No matter if she caused the explosion. The Night Division will now have a reason to intervene in the investigation in a fair and honest manner.

…

Five minutes later, they were on the edge of a small river two kilometers away from Hongshan Villas.

Jiangli laid the Witch down on the grass. Glancing at the river, she silently recited an incantation, causing a small pillar of water to rise from the river as she splashed it on the Witch’s face.

Splash!

It was late autumn, so the temperature of the water was a biting chill. The Witch suddenly woke up with a jolt, and before she could see anyone, she heard a question ringing inside her ear.

“You’re awake! You’re back to the original Lu Yibei now!”

Hearing this, her heart dropped as she checked her body. Quickly, she adjusted her emotions and blurted out, “Who? Who’s Lu Yibei?”

“…”

After being silent for a moment, she gave up trying to fool with the Witch who was hellbent on dying on that hill. She squatted down beside her, and calmly explained, “You gained a lot this time, haven’t you? Since I ran over to save you, shouldn’t I get a little something as well?”

Although this was a Robin-Hood-kind-of-situation where she stole psychic items from evil people, Jiangli still felt a little uneasy about leaving that many psychic items in her hands.

It’s necessary to take back some of the Night Division’s possessions, she thought to herself.

She was stunned for a moment when she saw Mew Mew’s face greeting her, and when she fully came back to her senses, she avoided Jiangli’s gaze and yapped, “Uh? What did you say? I don’t think I got you there.”

Somebody! Anybody! Help me! A woman is trying to extort me of my possessions!

“Stop acting dumb, please. I went to eavesdrop earlier, and they’re saying that the Lee family’s villa was broken into. The value of the psychic items that were stolen is equivalent to about 200kgs of gold…”

She was stunned for a moment and frowned. Those shitty little things are worth that much money?

Is he cooking the books by falsely reporting on their true value?

Shit. If I get caught, does that mean that I have to give everything back to him, in addition to paying him that amount…?!

Seeing her unmoving face, she added, “If he reports this situation to the Night Division, I’m afraid that you’ll be put on a bounty.”

Tilting her head, she spoke without an expression, “I’m not afraid! The Night Division won’t arrest me!”

I don’t give a fuck! Nobody is touching my money!

Jiangli opened her lips and was about to say something, but at this moment, a wave of psychic energy broke into Yibei’s perception.

Shit. Someone’s coming!

Her face morphed slightly as she grabbed Jiangli’s arm and leapt into a bush.

Jiangli looked at Yibei with puzzled eyes, and was about to ask before Yibei put his index finger to his mouth, “Shh! Somebody’s coming!”

As soon as she finished speaking, Jiangli could finally detect the presence, and a second later, they saw a familiar silver light zipping towards them in the distance.

Bai Kai? What is he…

Bai Kai revealed himself in a flash before Jiangli could finish her thoughts as he stood in front of the duo.

“Now, I wanna know which son-of-a-bitch fucked me over today!”

Stepping in front of the bush, he cursed as he pushed away its branches and its leaves, and upon seeing the inhabitants of the bush, he froze.

Within the bushes was Lu Yibei, and the other was a girl that he had never seen before.

Bai Kai’s face darkened as he pointed at ‘Mew Mew’, and asked, “Who is she?”

“…?!”

TRANSLATOR NOTES:

Jiangli’s here to save the day! I’m really enjoying translating her dialogue and actions!

As always, if you’d like to support the translation, you can do so by clicking the button below! ^_^