Becoming the Luna

Chapter 61

The door must have opened at some time but I couldn't hear, too caught up in my world of fear, the bed depresses on both sides but this only increases my terror.

I clutch the blankets draped around me with white knuckles, my breathing getting more erratic and it seems no matter how much I try to take in oxygen my body just won't accept it.

"Hayden, baby" Dale is the first to speak and somewhere in my panic-induced hyperventilation, I register that they're both here, they never left me but things have already been set into motion.

Dale pries off one of my hands off their deadly grip on the blankets, his second hand coming up to smoothen my hair down. "I need you to breathe for me, okay love." He says in a soothing voice but just like the first time I can't do it, it's like the episodes take my ability to do anything out of my hands and only an external force could jolt me.

"How many times do I have to tell you idiot, that's never going to work." Virgil says to him over me, his hand is cupping my face.

"Well I still have to try, I can't allow"

"He's starting to turn blue, D." Virgil says, cutting Dale's explanation off.

"Shit." He curses explosively. "I don't like this."

"I'm not a big fan of it either." Virgil agrees and they make some silent, unspoken agreement then lean towards me.

What were they.

Two identical gentle bites get imprinted on both sides of my neck at the same time and I'm screaming again, it has to be something in their teeth but on the plus side it breaks through my haze and I can process oxygen once again.

Virgil lies down beside me, peppering kisses over his bite mark and I truly calm down with his ever-present silent support, what was I scared of again?

I couldn't really remember, not with Virgil cuddling into my side like he wants to imprint his body on me so I never think he'll leave and Dale, hovering over me in expressive concern like he expects me to crash again onto another panic episode.

I don't even think I remember to hyperventilate at this point, it was one thing sleeping in between them and another being the center of their attention on the bed, those were two very different things.

"Hayden?" Dale murmurs to me, way more vocally expressive than Virgil. "What made you hyperventilate?" He asks, obviously grudgingly accepting that only pain seems to be what was able to jolt me from my episodes but their bites didn't hurt, on the contrary, it felt ridiculously good that I wondered how I ever thought it might take me back to that dimly lit room deep in the belly of the school.

The control of my body was starting to return but I still felt very sluggish, One of Virgil's hand had slipped under the blanket to wrap around me and pull me closer, his secondhand is buried in my hair and for the second time this evening he's nuzzling my neck and I'm thinking I could get used to the calming feeling of having him place endless tiny kisses all over my neck.

I have both hands free so I twiddle them in front of me and try to look timid, which is not easy to do when Virgil is beside me trying to send me hyperventilating again.

"I-I"  I mumble under my breath and nearly swallow my tongue when he moves close enough for me to make out identical strands of his curly, black hair, his bright green eyes fixed on me.

One of my hands goes up slowly to hide my single ear that wasn't on Virgil's side, while Dale looks at me hopefully, obviously still guilt-ridden at having to use gentle pain to jolt me out of my panic episode.

He must see the nervousness in my expressive grey eyes because he leans forward and places a kiss on my hair. "Take your time, baby."

My breath hitches again and I wonder when calling me pet names became a thing with them. "I-I got scared w-when I-I was all a-alone." I start softly, moving the hand over my ears to partially hide my face from his intense eyes.

"Doll, don't hide from me." He coos to me kissing my hair again and I hide my face in his neck, mortified and definitely an ugly shade of red.

It wasn't fair of him to suddenly have an endless supply of pet names unless he wanted me hyperventilating again, I knew I'd better string together a reply or he wouldn't give up.

"M-My mom left a-and the room got darker a-and scary, I-I felt like h-he was going to c-come back." I stutter into the crook of his neck, my voice muffled.

I noticed that I couldn't bring myself to say h-his name and the events of the evening starts to crash back into me, the entire thing replaying out in my mind even though it's the last thing I want.

What if they didn't want me anymore? Now that h-he had, had his hands all over me, I make a choking sound, gripping the soft cotton shirt Dale has on.

Dale pets my hair, letting me hide my face in his neck even though he said not to hide from him. "We're sorry we left you alone for so long but we had to clean up." He explains kindly and I hum distractedly, too absorbed in fighting the demons in my head.

"Hay?" Virgil says suddenly, raising his head. "Look at me." He says urgently like he senses the shift in my mood.

If I thought having Virgil and Dale fight over me at every chance they got was devastating, it couldn't have prepared me for when they decided to team up and I'm not sure if I'm to be grateful or terrified of their cooperation.

Gingerly I take my face out of the crook of Dale's neck and turn my head to the side slightly to obey his wishes, he cups my face with both of his hands, most likely seeing the teary pain in them.

He leans forward till we're nose to nose, his electric blue eyes fixed on me - what was it with them and trying to impale me with their upsetting eyes?

"What's wrong, baby? Talk to me." He murmurs to me, eyes still fixed on me.

I close my eyes briefly, they were going to be the death of me. I appreciated all of the attention because right now it was exactly what I needed not to dwell on h-him and what h-he tried to do.

"W-What if you d-don't w-want me anymore?" I ask in a tiny voice, sure that Virgil can't possibly have heard me.

Well, I miscalculated because apparently even Dale heard me and he's slipping inside the blankets to wrap his bigger body around me.

Virgil's eyes darken briefly and he looks like he wants to break h-his nose again or worse but then those striking blue orbs soften and he joins our foreheads together, his hands slipping upwards into my hair.

"That can never happen because wanting you isn't defined by anything." Virgil says hesitantly with his eyes closed.

My eyes blow wide open at his words, I know that Virgil isn't an emotionally expressive person so it took him a whole lot to admit that, this also reassures me because there was no way he'd lie about something like that.

I take in a deep, shaky breath, marveling at how they managed to dispel my fears so quickly and easily, I could trust them.

I close my eyes briefly as the implications of Virgil's words hit hard, Dale was obviously in full support because more of those tiny kisses start up over and around his bite, his hands rubbing gentle circles at my sides.

Wow! I-I d-don't know w-what to say or how to feel.

I blink open my eyes with a soft smile, turns out that the chances of your crush falling in love with you wasn't as slim as people said.

I look up at Virgil and blink at the suspicious twinkle in his eyes, the bright blue eyes darkening.

"W-What"  I don't get all my words out because he's swooping down and claiming my lips - well that was one way to show how much he wanted me.

I don't know about anyone else but getting kissed by Virgil twice in one night without having to ask at all couldn't possibly happen in real life so it only meant one thing, I'm having a nightmare.

I knew Virgil liked control but who would have thought it extended to his kisses too, from the first moment our lips met he took the lead, granted he was the one that kissed me but I'm not complaining.

I don't think I have enough brain activity left to even handle taking the lead so I just let him do as he wants, I needed the closure.

I remember wanting cuddles and I definitely got what I wanted, Virgil pulls away and places one last gentle kiss on my mouth before slipping into the blanket as well.

They still hadn't seen what I had on and I prayed that the blanket stays on and they don't get curious enough to check, Dale is having a field day tracing over the straps though and goosebumps litter my skin.

I decide to stay on my back, not sure if I can handle leaning to the side and being unable to move around, Dale and Virgil throw their legs over me, as if to shield me and I breathe in deeply at their obvious presence.

I don't know which is more believable, that Virgil admitted to wanting me or that he and Dale are actually on the first page for the first time in never, both are really good turnouts.

I start to feel drowsy, having no reason to complain at all when Virgil and Dale hide their faces in the crook of my neck, it was a nice feeling to be wanted.